You Asked, I Answered, Part II

See? I told you I didn’t forget about the second half of the questions. It just took me forever to write this long, long post and find/scan the photos. Let’s get right to it, shall we?

Karen asked: Maybe this is in your archives, but how did you meet your husband?

Aaron and I met in 1998, right after I had graduated from college. At the time, I spent weekends in the summer and fall working at the Ohio Renaissance Festival. Sounds geeky, I know, and it was. I was a lady of the Queen’s court, which meant I had the privilege of wearing a couch. Seriously – 30+ pounds of upholstery velvet, jewelry, hoop skirt…and did I mention that many early fall days in Ohio reach 90 degrees?

Anyway, Aaron was hired that year, and placed in the Queen’s court as a guard. That’s how we met. Near the end of rehearsals in August, I had been “dismissed” by another performer that I was interested in. He and I were a bit of an item, but I refused to sleep with him right away, and he didn’t feel like waiting around. That night, I was a little pissed off, and Aaron and other friends invited me to come out to dinner with them and rant. And it was that night that Aaron and I realized we were interested in each other. (So, thanks for being an asshole, Justin! Aaron and I appreciate it!)

Let’s keep going with questions about my past. Kgirl asked: so, did you really have a perm in seventh grade?

Oh yes, I did – three in fact. I had stick straight hair, and the first perm fell out in 24 hours. So I sat through another, and it fell out two days later. So for the third try, my stylist decided to cut my hair a little shorter, so there wouldn’t be so much weight on the curls. Now, we all know that when you curl hair, it gets shorter. And since she cut a few inches off my hair, it got even shorter with the perm. Essentially, I looked like little orphan Annie, with tight curls sprouting straight out from my head. It was hideous. I tried to find a picture of this, but apparently I burned every picture from that year. By eighth grade, it had grown out enough to be somewhat acceptable, thank goodness. Here is how it looked after a year of growth:

This was really the only picture I could find.

And kgirl had one other question: if there is one trait of yours that you hope your girls DON’T inherit, what is it?

I would hope they don’t inherit my complete naiveté. When I was younger, I believed almost anything that people told me. I always thought the best of people, even after they had wronged me. That led to a lot of disappointment and hurt. While I don’t want them to be complete cynics, I do want them to be critical thinkers who won’t believe everything they’re told. It’s taken me a long time to realize I can’t trust everyone, and I’d want to spare them the hurt I went through.

Next up is Vanda, who has a question and a followup question: How old were you when you got your first boy kiss? What was his name and how old was he?

It was the summer after my freshman year of high school, and I was 14. His name was Tim, and he was my first boyfriend. He was a year older than me. We had been “dating” (I use quotes there because really, we were too young to go on a date) for a couple of weeks already. It was time for me to go home that day, and he walked me to the end of the street. His little sister was tagging along behind us, saying “Kiss her already! Do it!” It was the fastest peck on the lips in the history of kissing. I was recently told that he has a wonderful boyfriend now. I’m not surprised.

Let’s move on now to Sarah, who also has two questions: What is the most embarrassing concert you have ever been to?

Um, New Kids on the Block. Twice. ‘Nuff said. I’m even more embarrassed to admit that I’m curious about their reunion tour.

Where were you when you lost your virginity?

At my home when I was 16, in my living room. It was…awkward. And not that exciting, to be honest.

And once again, you can hear the collective sound of my family clicking away from this post as fast as possible. Didn’t learn your lesson last time, did you? OK, let’s get back to the music topic. I’ve already admitted my love for NKOTB, so it can’t be worse than that, right?

Mamma Loves asked, Is there a song that brings your mind back to your first true love? What song is it?

Well, true love is such a tough thing to define. I mean, my boyfriend from the above question and I had “our song” but I wouldn’t call him a “true love”. The song was A Whole New World from Aladdin. I think that was one of the first movies we saw together, and I guess I still think of him when I hear that song, which makes showing that movie to Cordy a little weird. The song that always makes me remember my wedding is Come What May from Moulin Rouge. Aaron and I used that for our first dance. Love that song.

Continuing the music theme, Motherbumper asked, Who was your favorite band/musician going into Junior High and who was your favorite leaving High School? Tells a lot about the formative years.

Well, I’ve already admitted to my New Kids obsession, which lasted through most of junior high. I really can’t remember my absolute favorite from high school. Some of the bands/musicians I remember liking: Bryan Adams, Madonna, the Cranberries, Boyz II Men, U2 and Red Hot Chile Peppers. I’ll also admit to liking Mariah Carey and Meatloaf. What does that say about me? I guess I have a very wide range of taste in music.

Next up is Anne, who wondered, Speaking of high school… were you in a certain clique? (preppies, head-bangers, punks, geeks, etc.) Love or hate high school?

I was a geek. Plain and simple. But in my school, geeks really weren’t their own clique. Many of the smart kids were also athletes, and I wasn’t. So I wasn’t really a part of any group – I wanted to be a preppie kid, but couldn’t afford the right clothes and really didn’t like spending hours on my hair and makeup. As for if I liked high school, I will share with you the thought that flashed in my head as I crossed the stage to accept my high school diploma: “Its all over now, and I’m outta here!” Getting out of high school was one of the best things to ever happen to me. The teachers were great, but I don’t miss the insane, closed-minded social networks of high school.

I don’t know about you, but I need a little break from memory lane. Let’s take some questions about the here and now. Karen Sugarpants wanted to know: What do you do for YOU? You’re such a busy mom, I wonder what you do for yourself?

Well…not a lot. I mean, I have a little time in the evening to watch TV, and I loves me some American Idol right now. I’m also a big fan of House, Bones, and Torchwood. I also like to knit and sew when I find the time. (If I can commit to it, Mira will have an adorable knit dress for summer.) I also have a once a month moms night out group that I do dinner with. But what do I like to do the most for me? Sleep and shop.

Next up, Mommy Says asked: If I had one question, I’d ask what was the biggest dream you’ve had, that has not come true for you?

When I was a kid, I wanted to be an astronaut. But I’m scared of flying, so that really doesn’t work, does it? I’m pretty lucky in that I have most of the things I want in life: a house, two beautiful (if occasionally annoying) daughters, a husband who really understands me, and a supportive family. Sure, I dream of someday having enough money to never worry about it on a weekly basis, but I think that day will come eventually.

Fishygirl asked: Are you risk averse or an adrenaline junkie? What’s the riskiest thing you’ve ever done in your life?

I’m somewhere in-between, leaning more towards the risk averse side. I used to lean more towards adrenaline junkie, but having kids has mellowed me out and made me realize I need to take care of myself to be there for them. My riskiest thing I’ve ever done is a toss-up. I’ve gone white-water rafting down a river that has claimed several lives. I’ve hitchhiked in the Scottish highlands, but that’s considered pretty safe there.

I’d say the riskiest thing I’ve ever done was willingly joined in on a mob scene in London. It was the Euro 96 Football (soccer) tournament, and England had just played Scotland for the first time in many years. Scotland lost, and the Scottish fans took over Trafalgar Square. When I heard that they had shut down the Tube service and were sending police to the area, I decided this could be interesting, grabbed my camera, and ran for it. I got there just as the police surrounded the area, trapping me inside the square with the rowdy fans. I got clipped by a billy club at one point, and took a lot of pictures of drunk Scotsmen. Good times. A little dangerous, with the beer bottles being flung at the police and all, but very interesting.

Police (before suiting up in riot gear) in front of me
Drunken Scotsmen behind me, before the party turned ugly

Moving right along, Toni asked: What is your favorite post you’ve EVER written? And favorite one you’ve ever read on someone else’s blog?

My favorite post for sheer laughter has to be my Friday Night Smackdown post. I still enjoy reading that one. My favorite serious post is the day I was told Cordy is autistic. It’s still painful to read, but the part I love is the amazing support from all of the comments I received. It reaffirmed that mommyblogging really is about the community we’ve formed, first and foremost.

As for favorite post ever from someone else’s blog…are you kidding? I have so many that there’s no way I could pick just one! My Bloglines currently has 182 posts that I’ve saved so I could read again. I can tell you that today’s favorite post for me is Queen of Spain’s The Business of Mommyblogging.

Cindy, who is getting married soon, then asked two questions: What was your favourite part about your wedding? If you had it to do over again, what would you avoid doing at your wedding or what would you change about your wedding?

My favorite part of my wedding had to be mid-way through the reception, when someone had requested the song Let’s Do The Time Warp Again (from The Rocky Horror Picture Show), and half of the room jumped up and ran out to the dance floor to join in. I remember looking at everyone out there and thinking, “Yep, these are our friends.” Our wedding and reception were the perfect blend of everything lovely (gorgeous dress, elegant cake, pretty decorations) with lots of fun, too.

As for what I would change? Nothing. I loved the entire event. Wait, I can think of something: if we could do it over, I would have made sure someone remembered to grab the marriage certificate from the chapel. We thought it was put into a box with the other items from the ceremony, but it never reappeared. Oops.

And finally! To wrap this up, jerseygirl89 had two questions for me: What is your all-time favorite smell?

Vanilla. Had you asked me in fifth grade, I would have replied rubber cement. See how your tastes mature when you get older?

Can you remember a favorite outfit from junior high? If so, what was it?

I really can’t remember a favorite outfit, but I’m pretty sure it WASN’T this:


Ta-da! You asked, I answered. Thanks for all the questions everyone!



You Asked, I Answered, Part I

Wow, I didn’t expect so many questions from all of you! I’m going to have to split the answers into two posts, because 1) it would be too long to do as one post, and 2) I’m compiling and scanning some pictures to go along with answers to some of the questions about my past. Trust me, it’ll be worth it, if for no other reason than to laugh at my junior high fashion choices.

So let’s get this party started!

Julie had four questions for me:

What do you do when you’re angry at one of your kids?

Walk away, baby, walk away. (Can anyone name the song?) For those moments when I’m really angry, walking away is the best remedy. Then when I’ve counted to ten, or found some other way to calm down, I’ll address the problem.

If you were going to combine chocolate with one other food or flavor, and only ONE, what would it be?

Caramel. Yum.

Do you ever get comments on your blog that really piss you off even though they’re completely benign?

Absolutely. I try to never delete a comment unless it is truly aggressive, offensive, or just spam. Which means someone giving their own opinion doesn’t qualify, unless they’re trying to pick a fight. It sometimes pisses me off, but then I often leave the comment and let it serve its purpose to further the discussion.

Cotton underwear? Lace? Spandex?

Cotton, totally. It’s all about comfort. Lace & spandex only for special occasions.

OK, moving away from my underwear choices, Momma to LG asks:

Did you graduate from college before going back now?

Yep. In 1998 I graduated with my shiny new Bachelors of Arts in History, focusing on Tudor & Stuart Britain. Tried grad school, didn’t like it. Tried it again a few years later, this time for theatre history. I’m a few classes and a thesis paper away from that degree, but we moved and then I had Cordy, so I never got around to finishing it.

If you could take a trip anywhere, where would you go?

I’d like to see Ireland. I spent a summer living in London, and while there I saw many parts of England and Scotland, but never made it over to Ireland. I’d also love to visit India and Australia someday. Maybe I’ll throw in a return trip to Canada and we’ll call it the “British Empire” tour.

Continuing with the theme of school, Erin M asks:

What made you want to become a nurse?

The money, of course! (Just kidding.) When I had my c-section with Cordy, I had a four day hospital stay. Adjusting to motherhood while trying to recover from a c-section and initiate breastfeeding with a baby who wasn’t interested wasn’t the easiest thing I’ve ever attempted. The nurses who cared for me really made those first four days go well, and I was so thankful for their help and their advice. Just like with blogging, I feel like I can reach out and help others with nursing. I’d like a labor & delivery position, so that I can be one of those nurses that others will remember as helping them transition to motherhood. Besides, until blogging pays all our bills, it’s good to have a backup.

Hmmm…let’s move on to some lighter inquiries. How about Crackerjacksmo‘s questions:

Do you brush your teeth in the shower or at the sink?

Sink. I’ve never even heard of brushing teeth in the shower. Do people do that?

Do you prefer baths or showers?

Baths to relax, showers to actually get clean.

For what ever reason, what’s the longest amount of days you have gone WITHOUT bathing?

I think it was five days. I never would have gone that long when I had a job. But when you’re home and you and both kids have the flu? Personal hygiene takes a backseat. At least we weren’t going anywhere.

I’m liking these light questions. Let’s stick with them. Gwen asks:

OK, So I know that you are a Buffy fan. What is your favourite season, and why? What is your favourite episode and why? If you were able to sneak off for an illicit love affair with one of the cast who would it be?

Favorite season is tough. I really liked Angelus, Spike and Drusilla in Season two, but my favorite episode of all is probably “Once More With Feeling.” I’m a sucker for musicals. As for an illicit love affair, it’s gotta be David Boreanaz.

On a more personal note, has sex gotten better since you have had kids, or worse?

Whoa, what happened to the light questions? I’d have to say it got worse, then better, then worse again, and then better. (Are you still reading, family members? Yeah, that’s what I thought.) After Cordy was born, sex was the last thing on my mind. It took well over a year for me to even have interest in sex again. Everything was good for awhile, until Mira was born. I’m glad I had a VBAC, but I didn’t enjoy the third degree tear that came with it. The first time we tried to have sex after Mira was born (around eight weeks postpartum), the pain was so intense that I nearly took a swing at Aaron. We didn’t try again for awhile. Then, around the six months mark, everything suddenly got better. Can’t explain what it was. Now it’s even better than before we ever had kids.

Wow. That was personal, wasn’t it? To further insure my family will never read my blog again, let’s go next to Mrs. Flinger, who gets straight to the point with what she wants to know:

Who usually initiates sex in your marriage? And if it’s not you, how do you deal with that?

I’d like to say we have a 50-50 split when it comes to this, but it’s more like 80-20 in his favor. Does it bother me? Nah. I’m happy to let him initiate most of the time, and when I’m really in the mood, well, that would be the 20% where I’m willing to initiate.

Thank goodness you can’t see me blushing on the other side of the screen. Oh hell, you know me better than that. I’m not blushing at all. Moving on to Jennifer‘s question:

Most embarrassing thing you ever did after a little too much sauce…

Well, my first experience with alcohol was New Year’s Eve when I was 16. My friends spiked the punch and thought it would be funny to not tell me. I like punch. Too much. I apparently threw myself all over a guy at the party, who showed up with a date. She left early, though, and before the night was over, I kissed him. I dated him for six months after that. I wouldn’t have been embarrassed, since I didn’t remember, but my friends were sure to show me the pictures. Oh lord. Not only drunk, hanging off this guy, but also half-wrapped in streamers, too.

Next up, Mbkimmy asks:

If you could change your life to be anyone doing anything anywhere with kids or without – would you?

Tough call. Some days, I’d rather be anyone else but myself. Well, maybe not Britney. But then there are days like yesterday, when I got to be a part of this:


…and I’m perfectly happy being where I am.

And to wrap up part I, I turn to Tracey, who asked:

If money were no object, would you have any more children?

I think we’d probably have one more. We’ve always planned that Aaron would have a vasectomy when we are sure that we’re done. We considered it after Mira was born, but now we’re holding off. Money is really the biggest hurdle to having another child. While I hate the first trimester, I generally like being pregnant. And a part of me feels like there is one more child who should be with us.

What would you do with a week, hell, a MONTH with no kids or family to take care of? Just time, time, time ahead of you…

Just trying to think of an answer to this question makes my head spin. I can’t even imagine having that much time anymore. I’d probably sleep in every morning, take long walks, spend hours shopping at the mall, trying on clothes without anyone whining, relax on the couch with trashy TV, and of course, blog without guilt.

That’s it for tonight, folks! If your question didn’t get answered tonight, it will be answered in the next Q&A post, which will be up later this week.



100 Things You REALLY Want To Know About Me

The other day I was reading through another blogger’s “100 Things About Me” post, and I have to admit I found it kind of…limited. (No, it wasn’t yours – I liked yours. Or yours – yours made me laugh. It was someone who probably doesn’t even know I exist.)

There were some interesting tidbits in there, but some of the things I wanted to know the most were missing. I mean, your first pet’s name is fine, but what if I wanted to know the most inspiring place you’ve ever visited?

I considered doing one of those 100 Things lists for myself, but when I started to write it, I found myself constantly deleting things. Oh, no one cares that I used to eat the freeze-n-eat popsicles by the 100-count box every week as a kid. Or that I had a really bad perm in 7th grade.

So instead, I’m going to leave it up to all of you. This is your chance to play interviewer and ask me anything you’ve wanted to know about me or my family. Leave a comment with your questions and I’ll reply to all of them. No question is too off the wall. (I’m really asking for it, aren’t I?)

I’d say that I’m going to limit it to 100 questions, but that would assume I’d get more than 100 questions. Or 10 for that matter.

So, uh, don’t leave me high and dry, OK?

Ask a question?



Tales From The Backside

There are many firsts we look forward to in our lives: our first day of school, first kiss, first real-paying job, etc.

First hemorrhoid? Not exactly something to cheer about.

(It gets far worse from here on in, folks. Not Katie Couric “look-at-my-colon” detailed, but still more than some want to know. You’ve been warned.)

Thanks to a combination of pregnancy, a sedentary job, and a minor stomach bug, I developed my very own first hemorrhoid this weekend. How I managed to escape one of these with my first pregnancy, I have no idea. Though I had a c-section with Cordy, I now have a preview of what it will feel like post-birth if I am successful with my VBAC. And I’m scared.

The pain started after the stomach bug on Thursday. By Friday evening, walking and sitting were becoming difficult. Naturally, fate had to pick this weekend to do this to me: Aaron left mid-day Friday for a stage combat workshop, leaving me a single parent all weekend.

I knew something was wrong back there, but I figured it was something that would just go away. Everything I’ve read said that hemorrhoids were common late in pregnancy, and are nothing major. Stopping by the store, I bought some Tucks pads, figuring they would get rid of this little discomfort quickly.

By Saturday, though, the pain was something I couldn’t ignore. I felt like such a wimp – hemorrhoids are supposed to be a little uncomfortable, but nothing to cry over. I was supposed to get together with my friend L, but I doubted I could handle going out for long.

I tried to talk around the issue when I called L, thinking up several reasons why I couldn’t get together, before I finally fessed up to what was going on and told her the entire embarrassing story.

First sign of being in real pain: telling a friend about your backside troubles. A true friend won’t think you’re insane when telling her about your ‘roid. She understood, and agreed that I should not be in so much pain. I decided that maybe I wasn’t such a wuss, and went to an urgent care while L watched Cordy.

Second sign of being in real pain: willing to deal with the embarrassment of letting strangers examine your ass. I was expecting to be laughed out of the office by the doctor, but it turns out coming to the urgent care office was exactly what I needed to do.

Of course, I couldn’t just develop a small one for my first. No, that would be too easy. If we’re going to do something, let’s go all the way, right? According to WebMD, there are four types of hemorrhoids, each more severe than the next. For my first, I went straight to a fourth degree: thrombosed hemorrhoid. You can read the full details at that link, but the summary is it has a blood clot in it, is extremely painful, and in most cases requires medical assistance.

It was then I got to experience the other new pain of having two shots of lidocaine in that delicate area to numb it. At least I got to practice my labor breathing and try visualizing a happy place. You can bet that happy place didn’t involve a doctor staring at my naked butt while putting a needle into it.

After the shots, the pain was gone for awhile, and the entire procedure of removing the clot took less than five minutes. He then put a bandage over it, gave me a prescription for some ointment to help it heal, and sent me on my way.

It took three pharmacies to find one that had the ointment in stock. By that point, the lidocaine had worn off, and walking was damn near impossible. At the third, they told me they didn’t have the generic in stock, so I would have to either pay full price for the name brand or they could call around and find another pharmacy that might have it.

Third sign you’re in real pain: you pay way too much money for a tube of prescription hemorrhoid ointment because you can’t bear the thought of having to go to another pharmacy. At that point I just wanted to get home and lay on the couch.

I arrived home to find Cordy was asleep. L quickly gathered up her son and left me to take a nap also. I was so worn out from the experience, I fell asleep quickly. The doctor had made it sound like I would be pain-free right away, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.

Today I’m still hurting, but I hope it is getting better. Cordy has been hyperactive all weekend, making it difficult to rest. I’ve at least reached the point where I don’t care about sharing this very personal story with anyone, since I’m telling the entire internet at the moment. If anything, it serves as a lesson to other pregnant women: eat your fiber, drink your water, and stay healthy. Save the real pain for labor and the hemorrhoids you might get from labor, not some stupid pregnancy hemorrhoid before the real fun begins.

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