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Feb 4, 2009

One Outfit, Two Kids, Three Years

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One benefit of having two children of the same gender is reusing clothing for the second child. Yes, Mira will someday hate me for making over half of her wardrobe Cordy’s old clothing, but for now she doesn’t care. And I especially love it because of the wash of memories and emotions I get when pulling out one of Cordy’s old outfits that I loved so much.

Yesterday, I dressed Mira in one of my particular favorites, and after seeing her fully dressed, I had to take a picture, and then compare it to one of Cordy:


That’s Mira on the left, and Cordy on the right. I should also point out that in these two photos, Mira is 5 months older than her Amazon sister – Cordy was only 15 months old and wearing 24 mo. clothing.

What’s amazing to me is seeing the differences between my two girls. They have some similar features, but staring at each photo, I can practically feel the different spirits of each child coming from each image.

Mira is, and has always been, the analytical one. She watches everything around her carefully, taking it all in and not tipping her hand as to how she’s feeling until she’s fully taken it all in. She is cool in all she does, and often holds everything inside until she bursts. It’s only when there are no cameras or strangers around that she fully relaxes into the goofy girl we know.

Cordy, on the other hand, holds nothing back. A complete open book. Every photo of her at that age shows a child smiling at the camera (or looking rather angry if that was how she was feeling). Not a neutral face could be found, because her heart was always firmly planted on her sleeve.

And just because I can’t go digging through my photo archives and post only one photo of Cordy as a toddler, I’ll add in this one, too.


Sometimes I wish I could stop time for a little while.

PS – Go visit my reviews blog today for a sweet Valentine’s giveaway. Let’s just say it’s a little something to help bring back the romance in your life!

Filed Under: Cordy, memories, Mira, sisterhood ·


Jan 6, 2009

I’ll Send You Her Therapy Bills

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I’ve noticed a trend lately among friends, family and even complete strangers when they lay eyes on my two little girls together. It usually goes something like this:

Person: (gushing) “Oh, look at Cordy! She’s gorgeous! You know that, right? She could easily be a model. Those curls are so pretty, and her eyes are such a deep blue. She’s really is a beautiful little girl!”

Me: “Thank you! Yes, she is very pretty.”

*Person then turns gaze towards Mira, and then in a less exuberant voice:

Person: “Hi there, Mira! Cute outfit. You look just like your father, you know that? No denying who your daddy is!”

Me: “Um…yeah. She does have some of Aaron’s best features, making her pretty, too.”

That’s it. They tell us how pretty Cordy is, and then totally leave out that part when pointing out Mira’s appearance.

Poor kid. Rarely does anyone tell her she’s pretty. And while I would never emphasize a need for beauty in order to be successful (because I want to be a part of killing the stereotype that women need to focus on beauty), I worry that if this trend continues it might begin to affect her when she’s older and understands.

I’m pretty too, dammit

I know I’d start to feel inadequate if someone close to me was constantly praised for her beauty while I was given a passing remark about a family resemblance. Even with constant self-esteem building, it might be enough to put a dent into an armor of confidence.

And it’s not like Aaron needs a bag on his head to go out in public, either. I’m biased, but others have confirmed for me that he is generally thought to be good-looking. But often any comparison between Aaron and Mira is said without as much…excitement? or as if there’s another message hidden underneath? I can’t be sure. Maybe I’m totally reading into something that is more shallow than I thought.

Either way, if Mira looks like Aaron it’s a good thing. She has his eyes. She sports a lovely olive skin tone that will keep her from burning in the sun, unlike me and Cordy who look out a sunny window and turn pink. It’s possible she’ll have her father’s curls, too. It’s not like she’s sporting his beard, ya know?

Hopefully these specific conversations will fade away as Mira gets older and people are more careful with their words, as we all are with other adults. And despite who is the prettiest, both girls will continue to be valued at home for their personalities and accomplishments. In our house there is no “ugly” sister – just two girls treasured because of who they are in total.

And besides, it’s not like Cordy hasn’t had her share of not-so-pretty days:


Not too far off from this, is it?

Filed Under: Mira, sisterhood ·


Dec 12, 2008

Haiku Friday: Smile!

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Haiku Friday
We need a Christmas
card picture, but getting both
kids to smile is hard.

This one is cute but
too bad the cat knocked the lamp
onto Mira’s head


Another try: one
isn’t smiling and one is
looking away…sigh


Let’s try again. One
still looking away, one with
mouth full of cookie


C’mon girls, smile!
Wait! Stop choking your sister
Cordy! No headlocks!

(Ya gotta click on this one to see Mira’s expression up close.)

The only time they
sit together is when they
are eating cookies

So every attempt
shows two mouths covered in fine
layers of brown crumbs

I give up. I’ll have
to rely on Picnik to
create a good pic.

I always thought it was difficult to get a good picture of Cordy for our holiday cards each year. Turns out, having two kids isn’t twice as hard – it’s about 649 times as hard. Like trying to wrangle dinosaurs through your great-grandmother’s miniature glass animal collection.

And for some reason, the only time I can get these two to sit next to each other is if there are cookies involved. If I should wipe their mouths off, the moment is gone and they won’t even stay in the same part of the room. Thank goodness for photo editing.

To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your main blog URL). DON’T sign unless you have a haiku this week. If you need help with this, please let me know.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button at the top.

REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will delete any links without haiku!

Filed Under: Cordy, Haiku Fridays, holidays, Mira, sisterhood ·


Aug 28, 2008

What Happens When You’re Told "Mommy, Take A Picture Of Me!"

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Mommy, look at me!

Mira is an unwilling participant (and had a clothing change)


If I thought for one minute that she’d ever sit still for hair, makeup, bright lights and lots of people, I might let her be a child model.
Filed Under: Amazons, Cordy, daily life, Mira, random, sisterhood ·


May 22, 2008

A Birthday Party Quandary

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In a perfect world, we would be celebrating Mira’s first birthday today, the 21st. But the little diva decided that she wasn’t going to comply with some arbitrary due date, and instead waited another six days to make her appearance.

And while her actual birthday is next Tuesday, we’re having her party this Saturday, because adult schedules don’t always match up with baby birthdays. This will be the first party where Cordy is not a focus or THE focus of the celebration.

We’ve been dealing with some jealousy again from Cordy. Cordy’s recent hugs look more like take downs. Mira is practicing standing and taking her first tentative steps, but any cheer to encourage her ends with Cordy doing something to get the focus on her. Like pretending to fall down and “hurt” herself. Or just tripping Mira and laughing wildly.

And while I understand that she wants attention too, that doesn’t mean I’m going to completely ignore my younger daughter. I think she expects us to be all oh, Cordy, you’re the only one we care about! This other kid? Eh, just kick her if she gets in the way. She’s a big bore to be around anyway – can’t even walk yet! Don’t worry, we’ll only cheer YOUR accomplishments!

It’s getting old.

So when planning this party, my mother suggested, “I’m going to bring a gift for Cordy. You might consider getting her some gifts, too.”

“But it’s not her birthday, mom. She’ll get lots of attention when it’s her birthday. Isn’t Mira allowed to have her own day?”

“Cordy needs to know that she’s special, too.”

I can see her position, sort of. I mean, Cordy got presents when Mira was born. Sort of a peace offering of here, this little screaming being is about to usurp your power and guarantee you’re not the center of attention 100% of the time from here on out, but here’s a cute little stuffed animal and t-shirt to make it all better, so go give your new sister a kiss. She’s had to deal with a lot of change since then, and seeing everyone spend a day lavishing attention and gifts on Mira could cause some hurt feelings, or a rebellion that I really don’t want to deal with.

But at the same time, I want Mira to have her own special time, too. I’ve heard the stories of younger siblings who felt like they never got enough attention because they always had another sibling to deal with. Cordy had nearly three years all by herself – two birthdays and three sets of Christmas, Hanukkah, and Easter to be the solo golden child. Mira will never have that. Shouldn’t her birthday be that one day where it’s all about her?

I was an only child, so I never had to deal with this issue. Well, I did, but not in the same way. My birthday and my mom’s birthday are a day apart on the calendar, so I never had a family birthday party that wasn’t a joint party. I never even had my own cake – it was always a shared cake.

So I need your help, oh friends in my little electronic box: do we give Cordy a present? Should we help ease her sibling jealousy and show her that even though the party is for Mira, she gets cake, presents, and attention too? Or do we tell her to suck it up and get over herself, because life’s not fair and occasionally you have to step into the shadow and let someone else have their moment?

What do I do? Should I find some way to recognize Cordy at Mira’s birthday party? Or do we put the focus on Mira alone?

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Filed Under: Cordy, growing up, Mira, sisterhood ·