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Nov 11, 2011

There Are Some Toys I Will Never Buy

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Consider this a follow-up to my previous post about advertising.

We have a reward system in our house for good behavior, and the girls can save up their points to trade in for extra TV time, dessert, dinner out, or a toy. Everything has different values and they’re encouraged to save for items they really want.

I’ve been pretty lenient with the requests Cordy and Mira have had for items they’ve seen on TV. Cordy really wanted a Happy Napper after seeing the commercials for it, so she saved up her points for two weeks (with a lot of helping out with chores and good behavior to earn as many as possible) and traded them all in for a ladybug Happy Napper. I think she’s happy with her choice, although I was expecting some letdown afterward.

They’re allowed to make bad choices with their points. Better to learn now what is worth saving up for and what is a disappointment before they start using real money without any guidance from us. And there will be a time when they’ll get excited about a commercial and buy the toy, only to find it not nearly as exciting as the commercial made it out to be.

However, there are limits. We’ve seen this commercial on the Hub network for the past week:

 

They will never have enough points to get this. And they’ve been informed that Santa’s elves are unable to make this particular game.

I don’t care how much Cordy or Mira beg, I draw the line at a pooping dog game.

I’ll buy them a real puppy first.

Have you ever told your child that it was impossible to buy something for them just because you did not want it in your house?

Filed Under: Cordy, daily life, Mira, pop culture ·


Oct 14, 2011

After These Messages

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When it comes to family TV time, we usually limit our selections to Nick Jr (Noggin), Disney Junior, Netflix or DVDs. My thinking was that if I’m going to let my kids watch TV, I’d prefer to limit them to TV free of commercials while they were very young.

I never expected them to shun all marketing and I knew that the licensed characters they saw on TV shows would still lead them to want toys with those characters on it. But if it limited their consumerism even a little, I figured it was worth it.

But then we discovered My Little Pony on the Hub network. And now I’m doomed.

Hub has at least two commercial breaks during every show. We try to Tivo episodes and then watch them with the girls, fast forwarding through commercial breaks. Then there are those times when I let the girls watch TV so I can get something else done, and I’m not always there to hit that fast forward button. Meaning they get to see every “Act now for this incredible offer!” promotion.

So, what do my two impressionable young daughters think of commercials?

Mira now chants, “Take me to Party City!” thanks to their Halloween commercial. Children in the commercial repeat that same statement over and over, and she’s now convinced that she needs to go there for her Halloween costume.

Cordy told me she’d make fewer messes with her snacks if I’d buy her a gyro bowl. Never mind the fact that she never makes a mess when eating a snack.

Mira is begging me for an insulated lunch bag that will keep her lunch cold for up to 8 hours. When I remind her that none of her lunch needs to be kept cold, she gets upset and points out that, “Dat mom bwogger on TV wecommended it!” I guess in her mind, all mom bloggers must stick together and use the same products.

Mira also insists that the chocolate milk shown in one commercial would be “healthy” for her. I tried to explain that just because they say it’s “healthier” because it’s a good source of vitamin D and calcium and is free of high fructose corn syrup doesn’t change the fact that it’s still filled with sugar. And that all milk has calcium and vitamin D.

Mira even asked if we could please buy one of those aluminum storage building. You know, because we need a carport or hobby building next to our garage or something. And they’re sooooo shiny.

I won’t even begin to discuss all of the pillow pets, make-your-own stuffed animals, play-doh ice cream factory and other toys they now insist they can’t live without.

Marketing works, folks.

After recovering from the horror of watching my kids mindlessly ask for junk they don’t need just because the TV told them they wanted it, I decided that this was a prime chance to teach them about persuasion and marketing.

I still fast forward through most commercials, but occasionally we watch them together and discuss what the people who made the ad were trying to do. Did they want us to do something or buy something? Why do they say we need it? Do we really need it? Do we already have a similar item that works well for us?

It’s also started a discussion about money, both how we get money and what we do with it. Cordy and Mira still have trouble understanding that we have a finite amount of money to spend, and there are some things we have to spend our money on first (bills) before we can then consider items that aren’t as necessary. Progress is slow in this area, but I think if we keep talking about it with them it’ll sink in.

I won’t rant about the “evils” of marketing. I know that businesses need to sell their products, and it’s up to their marketing departments to find a way to make the product appealing so that people will want to part with their money. Hell, I have an entire review blog devoted to trying out products of interest, using my real-life experience with an item to help provide an honest testimonial for the product. I sell ad space on my blog. I get it.

But just because I believe there is a place in the world for marketing doesn’t mean I plan to let my children be blind followers of consumerism. If they’re going to see commercials (and as they get older they’ll be exposed to more and more everywhere they go), I want them to think about more than what’s being presented on the surface and consider the truth behind what’s being said. Is that chocolate milk really healthier? Healthier than what? It certainly can’t be as healthy as plain white milk, right?

I think this will be a lesson that continues for some time. I’m glad they didn’t see as much advertising when they were younger, but now is a good time to start explaining how it works. They’re as receptive to the message we’re giving them as they are to the commercials – here’s hoping we can be a little more persuasive than the marketing professionals at least most of the time.

(I can’t say all the time, because let’s face it – marketing works on me, too!)

Full disclosure: Just in case it needs to be said, I do not endorse any of the products listed above, and specifically will NOT be taking Mira to Party City for her costume, but instead plan to visit a locally owned costume shop.

Filed Under: Cordy, daily life, Mira, money, pop culture · Tagged:


Sep 30, 2011

Retro Pop Media Exposure

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One of the best things about being a mom is getting to expose my children to all of the pop culture I grew up with when I was a kid. Sure, the TV programs of today are certainly more educational – with the exception of the always educational Sesame Street – but the nostalgic side of me still fondly remembers the cartoons and movies of my youth.

And thanks to Netflix having nothing decent from the past five years available in its instant streaming collection, I’ve been having regular flashbacks to the days of neon clothing and non-computerized animation. Some things haven’t changed: Jim Henson Studios is just as awesome as it was back then. But I’m realizing that some of my memory may have been clouded now that I’m watching all of these cartoons and movies with an adult’s judgment. Yet some of them are just as fantastic now as they were in the eighties.

What have I been forcing…umm…encouraging my daughters to watch recently? Glad you asked!

He-Man and She-Ra – The animation is very heavy on stock footage, and you can tell each voice actor has at least 6 characters on his or her credits, but the storylines still hold up today. The moral of the story at the end of each episode (just in case you didn’t pick up on that episode’s theme) is still cute, too.

But I especially love the girl-power message in She-Ra, and will gladly let Cordy and Mira watch this whenever they want.

Fraggle Rock – I never really watched Fraggle Rock much as a kid. I liked the original Muppet Show and Sesame Street, but for some reason I wasn’t that interested in Fraggle Rock. Now that my kids watch it, though, I wish I would have seen more of it when I was younger. The green-screen effects are ancient, but muppets are timeless.

Scooby Doo – This one I take no credit for. They’ve both seen Scooby Doo at school, and then asked to watch it at home. I didn’t like Scooby Doo much as a kid, and I still don’t care for it now. I like the idea of solving mysteries and proving that most scary things are explainable, but the humor just isn’t for me. If they ask to watch Scooby Doo, I use that time to catch up on email or clean. In another room.

Labyrinth – I loved this movie as a child for the fantasy storyline and the beautiful scenery. As an adult, I can’t stop staring at David Bowie’s package on display in those tights throughout the entire movie, which I guess means I’m still enjoying the beautiful scenery. Still a great story, still a fun adventure, and muppets are still timeless.

Jem – (Damn, I shouldn’t have put this right after Labyrinth – Jem & the Goblin King apparently have the same hairdresser.) I loved Jem as a kid. Had the dolls (with the cassettes that came with each of them), knew all the songs, and watched every episode. Watching it now, I wonder how brainwashed I must have been to like this show. Truly outrageous? More like truly baaaaaaad. The animation is awful, most of it features stereotypes of shallow, catty behavior in women, and how did I forget there was so much kissing in this show? Of course, I forgot all of this until AFTER I showed an episode to my kids. Now they love it and want to see more. Oops.

My Little Pony – OK, so my daughters aren’t watching the original My Little Pony that I watched in the eighties. There’s a new series on the Hub network now, and all of the reviews I’ve read say that it’s much better than the original. I have vague, fuzzy memories of being enamored with the original, so I’ll just have to take their word for it. The new series is fun, the ponies have a lot of attitude, and the new animation style is slick.

The Neverending Story – Admit it: you cried when Atreyu’s horse sunk in the swamp. I did every single time I saw this movie. And Cordy proved yet again to be a younger version of me – while watching it for the first time, all she could think about for the remainder of the movie was, “What happened to his horse? Will the horse be OK?” Forget the Nothing swallowing up all of Fantasia, or the creepy-yet-pretty Southern Oracle with the laser eyes, or the Empress dying…it’s all about Atreyu’s horse. Cordy wasn’t able to get a close enough look at the horse at the end of the movie to tell if it was the same horse, and even today she’s still worried about that horse sinking in the swamp. We may wait another year before attempting this movie again.

Care Bears – Care Bears can burn in a smiley rainbow fire if I had anything to say about it. Maybe a little harsh, but I find them annoying now. I think I liked them as a very young child, but I can’t remember. If I did, I’d like to take this chance to apologize to my mother for being forced to endure the Care Bear Stare.

Voltron – This was one of my favorites as a kid. (The Voltron with the lions, not the one with the cars.) I still like it, although both Cordy and Mira are unimpressed. Heathens. I’m sure I’ll be able to convince them of the stellar quality of this cartoon someday.

Beakman’s World – This was actually from the nineties, but it was amazing. Beakman was the more guerrilla-style, gross-em-out and keep-em-coming-back-for-more science teacher to Bill Nye’s more straight-laced version. But it worked, and it made science really cool.

Cordy has watched every episode of this now and can tell you how antibodies work and where rain goes when it dries up, as well as several other impressive science facts. The more she watches, the more science she absorbs, and I’m happy to contribute to that addiction.

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So that’s what we’ve been watching lately, and I’m sure it’s just the beginning. After all, there’s still Thundercats. And Gargoyles. And The Dark Crystal. Then all of Star Wars, then all of Harry Potter, then…

What about you? Are there any movies or TV shows from your youth that you’ve exposed or can’t wait to inflict on your kids?

Filed Under: being a mom, memories, pop culture · Tagged:


Sep 14, 2011

First Grade Homework Is Killing Me

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I knew that with the start of first grade, homework wasn’t far behind. I’ve seen other parents on Facebook and Twitter talking about how young they start kids with homework now, so I was prepared. When the homework folder arrived in Cordy’s backpack for the first time, I turned off the TV and sat at the table with Cordy to help her complete her homework. It took about 20 minutes for her to do all of the worksheets, which seemed like a lot of time to devote to homework each night for a six year old.

And then I found out that was her homework for the entire week. Oops. Ah well, at least she had several days off from doing homework, right?

This week, though, one of her worksheets stumped me. I knew that someday she’d ask for help with homework and I’d be unable to help because I would have forgotten advanced algebra or the process of photosynthesis because they just aren’t practical in my everyday life and my brain cells needed room for more important things, like the bajillion passwords I have to remember for every online account or the lyrics of Katy Perry’s Last Friday Night. I never thought I’d be unable to answer a question about first grade grammar.

The worksheet had several sentences on it, with the instruction, “Write the naming part of the sentence below each sentence.”

Wait – the “naming part” of a sentence? WTF?

“Uh, Cordy, I’m not exactly sure what you’re supposed to do for this worksheet,” I explained. “Do you know what the naming part of a sentence is?”

“No, mommy. I don’t know.”

Well…great.

I turned to Twitter, where I was mostly met with silence and the one suggestion that maybe it was the noun in the sentence. Apparently most of Twitter has forgotten their first grade grammar as well, which made me feel a little better. Unity in cluelessness.

I then turned to the all-knowing Google, where 90% of the links agreed that the “naming part” of the sentence is its subject. 

Obvious response: so why not call it the SUBJECT then?

Dear textbook editors: I understand that writing new versions of the same, dry material can be boring. But syntax naming is not an area for you to flex your creative muscle in order to freshen up the lesson. You’re confusing the hell out of us parents and making us look like we couldn’t pass a basic elementary school standardized test. Also? What’s wrong with “subject?” The “naming part” just sounds babyish. Stop dumbing down my kid’s lessons!

I’m sure this won’t be the last I see of these changes, but I really hope I’ll be able to translate her homework in the future. Next thing you know she’ll have to find the “doing-stuff part” of the sentence.

(OMG, please don’t let that be on next week’s homework or I swear I’ll homeschool her with my 1980’s curriculum, when we actually had to know the real names of the parts of a sentence. And use non-safety scissors to cut things. And walk uphill in the snow to school. Both ways.)

Filed Under: being a mom, Cordy, pop culture, school ·


Aug 12, 2011

Fashion: When Are You Too Old?

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So after returning from BlogHer, where I spent five days with 3000+ women who were all looking fantastic in their own ways, I found out yesterday that an article I was interviewed for was published at CNN. The topic revolved around moms dressing like their teenagers, or in my case, older women who shop in the Juniors’ department of a store.

It’s a quick read – go check it out, I’ll wait.

I think the article does a great job of explaining why it’s OK to shop in the same place as a teenager as long as you’re dressing in a flattering way for your body type. Just because you’re in Hollister doesn’t mean you can’t find a simple, well-fitting t-shirt that doesn’t reveal too much. Of course, I’m writing that sentence as if I have any idea what kind of clothing Hollister carries.

There’s so much I can say on this topic beyond my quotes in the article. Do I think any teen fashion can be adopted by a 30- or 40-something mom? No way. But depending on your body type you can find cute clothing in a store focused on a younger population, or even the Juniors’ section at Kohl’s, that is still appropriate and tasteful for an older woman.

(Gah. I just lumped myself in as older. ‘Scuse me while I go take my fiber pill now…)

When I was younger and in that “appropriate” age range for these stores, I didn’t fit the clothing. I was heavier, I had self-esteem issues, and so I was far more comfortable hiding myself in baggy jeans and loose sweatshirts. I’m still a big fan of casual clothing, but having dropped some weight – both in pounds and in psychological baggage – I can appreciate clothing that’s a little more flattering to my shape. There’s no chance I’ll be sporting a mini skirt and crop top anytime soon, of course; I know my limits. I shop now for clothing that is comfortable and makes me happy when I wear it, no matter where it came from.
It’s always interesting to read the negative comments in the article, too: moms who wear teen clothing must be slutty. If you’re a mom, you shouldn’t care what you look like anymore. If you want to look nice, you’re just shallow and self-absorbed. *eyeroll*

Let’s play a little game: here are some of the outfits I wore at BlogHer this year. I’ll state up-front that I have no intentions of winning a fashion award anytime soon. Guess which one came from the Juniors’ department:

Thursday in the Expo hall

Thursday night: strapless dress & crochet cardigan

Friday night: lavender lace dress (sorry, can’t find a photo in color)

Saturday morning: brown ruffled, layered top and jeans

Saturday – another view of the same outfit, with Elmo totally checking me out

OK, so what’s your guess? Which one was designed for a teenager and not a 35 year old mom?

…

insert Jeopardy music here …

…

SURPRISE! It’s the brown layered-look shirt. Yep, this beauty of full-coverage-yet-fashionable ruffles and layers comes from the Juniors’ section of Kohl’s. The other outfits? Lee jeans, H&M top, JC Penney dress from the women’s section, and Ruche lace dress.

I found similar tops to the Kohl’s layered top in the women’s section, too, but they didn’t fit me as well. They were too boxy and made me look completely shapeless. The teen version is better fitted through the midsection and I received several compliments while wearing it. The jeans aren’t from the teen section, of course – no teen jeans would ever fit my hips.

My final thoughts: I’m no fashion plate. I can count dozens more who are more fashionable than me. But I do like to dress in a way that makes me feel pretty. Clothing is both a shallow topic and a subject that we wrap up in our self-worth. It can be a form of expression and a signal of our inner feelings. It can be a tool to empower us or a weapon to tear us down. While I don’t think women should invest so much of our self-worth into a piece of fabric, I do consider it reasonable that we can enjoy what we wear.

My belief is that we’re all smart women – we know what is appropriate for us. Wear what makes you look and feel your best no matter where it came from, whether it be Forever 21 or Forever 65. Because if you feel good about yourself, it’ll be reflected in everything you do, including the all-important task of building self-esteem in your children. It doesn’t matter if you’re raising your kids in a sweatshirt or a pair of pink heels as long as you’re confident in yourself.

What do you think? Are there certain stores that we shouldn’t shop in? Should women who reach a certain age be shunned from the Juniors’ section completely? Is it possible to follow fashion and not be accused of dressing like a teen or being a bad mom (unless you’re Jennifer Lopez)?

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Filed Under: being a mom, BlogHer11, me me me, more than parents, pop culture, shameless bragging ·