Adventures in Social Skills

Yesterday at school, as reported to me by Cordy’s teacher:

Teacher: Cordy, what snacks do they have in Room 14?

(Note: Room 14 is the special needs class Cordy visits at the end of the day.)

Cordy: It’s a secret. If you want a snack, then you need to go home and cook.

Thank goodness her teacher has a sense of humor and found it funny. Although I’m not entirely certain Cordy meant it to be funny. If that’s the case, then I’m REALLY glad her teacher has a sense of humor.
Every social interaction is a learning opportunity, right?



Early To Bed, Early To Rise

When Cordelia was a toddler, our friends and family marveled that we had her on such a great sleep schedule. Around 6:30 or 7:00pm each night, she would actually crawl (or later walk) to the stairs and point up to her room, letting us know that it was time for bed. We’d change her into her PJs, read her a book, and take her up to her crib. Then we’d place her in her crib and walk away. She’d often babble and talk to herself, but rarely did she cry or protest.

Comments like, “Wow, you’ve sleep trained her SO well!” were not uncommon, often followed by stories of how their child would fight bedtime, get up repeatedly, or cry at being imprisoned in the crib. It would be easy to pat ourselves on the back and take full credit for the amazingly peaceful nights we had with Cordy, but the truth is we had very little to do with it: Cordy was the one who determined her own bedtime.

At this point, you may still consider us the winners of the bedtime lottery. A toddler who goes to bed by 7pm every night, leaving you free to spend time with your spouse without interruption? We even had a period of several months where Cordy would sleep until 6am each morning. Yes, I’ll admit we were spoiled. (If you consider spoiled to also include a child who refused to nap during the day at all and had violent tantrums that we would later find out were symptoms of autism. But that’s not today’s topic.)

It did have its benefits, but there were downsides. First, she was always awake by 6am, meaning someone had to get up early with her. Second, her sleep schedule made it hard to do anything with her in the evenings, because no matter where we were, she was asleep by 7pm, and grumpy if moved. If we had a family gathering in the evening, we could count on finding her asleep on the floor long before 8pm.

Or asleep mid-cookie at Christmas (2007)

And then there’s one other problem.

While being asleep that early in the night is great for a toddler or preschooler, it isn’t as useful for a seven year old. To this day, Cordy still goes to bed early. It’s not a strict 7pm anymore, but she still has trouble staying awake any later than 8pm.

 Visiting friends 2 weeks ago, 7pm

The problem with this situation is that going to sleep so early makes it impossible to get her involved in many after-school activities, or even have a lot of time to spend with her family in the evening. She’s home from school by 5pm, does her homework, dinner by 6pm, and then it’s time to get ready for bed. We pushed bedtime back to 7:30pm (from 7pm), although there are still many nights when the clock has barely crossed into seven o’clock and Cordy is complaining that she is tired and wants to go to bed.

Occasionally we ask her to stay up late, and sometimes she can keep herself up until 9pm, but it takes a lot of effort. For New Year’s Eve this year, she was awake (although very groggy) until 11:30pm, but only because she slept for 40 minutes on our way home from the zoo that night.

New Year’s Eve

All of the advice books say to gradually step back the bedtime and in return the child will gradually start waking up later as well. Ha. Not this girl. No matter how late she’s up, her bedroom door still opens promptly at 6am and Little Miss Sunshine strolls down the stairs for the day. Only if we force her to stay up too late, Little Miss Sunshine turns into Little Miss Crabbypants quickly during the day, and keeping her up late again still does nothing to change her wake-up time. (But does make her progressively more grumpy.)

At this point, I don’t know what to do. I have the opposite problem of most parents: I want my child to stay up later! I’d like to give her the chance to take a class or be in a Girl Scout troop, but unless it’s offered on a Saturday it isn’t possible at the moment.

Anyone have any advice on how to convince a Sleeping Beauty to stay up later and enjoy the night?



Short Hair

Cordy is a child that prefers everything exactly the way it has always been. She has a routine she likes to follow, and any deviation generally results in drama. Her meals are from a short list of acceptable foods and have to be served in the right order; for example, macaroni and cheese is appropriate for lunch if we’re out at a restaurant, but at home it can only be a dinner, and a sandwich is the obvious lunch choice.

So when it comes to Cordy’s hair, she’s resistant to change. She’s always had long hair, mostly due to fear of cutting it. In the past, I’ve had to sneak in at-home trimming sessions when she was distracted just to keep that thick head of hair under some pretense of control. It knots up with just a gentle breeze passing by, and attempts to comb her hair are met with screams and tears.

I’ve tried to find out why she doesn’t want her hair cut when it clearly bothers her so much to care for it when it’s long. She’s told me everything from it keeps her warm to she’s afraid people will think she’s a boy if it’s short.

In the fall we had luck with getting Cordy’s first professional haircut, although she refused to let us cut off much of it. The appointment was still full of some drama, with Cordy occasionally crying and begging the stylist to stop, but we survived.

The problem with hair is that it keeps growing. And so this weekend, as I ripped through masses of knots in her hair, I decided it was time for another haircut.

But this time was different. “I want a haircut,” Cordy told me. What? Who is this kid?

“And I want it short, mommy.”

Wait…did I hear that right? The girl who has insisted she’ll never have short hair now wants it short?

Cordy held her hand up to the top of her ear. “I want to cut it up to here!” she proclaimed. I then explained just how short that was and asked if we could not go quite that extreme and maybe aim for a cute bob instead? She agreed, but I wasn’t sure she’d go through with it.

Saturday afternoon we took both girls to the salon for their haircuts. Mira, who had no issues last time, happily sat for her trim to get her curly bob bouncy again.

My change-phobic Cordy completely surprised me. She was upbeat, she held still for the stylist, she didn’t cry or scream when she was combing through her thick hair, and she got it all cut off.

You could make another kid from all that hair.

When she was done, I barely recognized my own child.

Excuse me, kid, have you seen a mop-headed little gir…oh. Wait…

As for Cordy? She loves her new haircut! She immediately grinned and said she can’t wait to “trick all the boys” because they won’t know it’s her. (I’d like to think it’s because they like her, but she then said they won’t tease her if they don’t know it’s her. Hmmm…must follow up on that, pronto.)

Now that she’s got the short hair, I’m kinda missing her wild mane. Sure, we fought constantly over it, but it was gorgeous despite the knots. Her new cut is really cute, though. Washing and combing it will be very easy to get used to.

I now understand why my mom insisted I have short hair all through elementary school. Eeeeaaassy.

 I was kind enough to avoid bangs for Cordy, however. 
(Yes, that’s me. Age 8.)


And A Pinkie Pie On Every Tree

One of the things I love about blogging and social media is the ability to have a direct line to the people who can help you out.

For example, Cordy and Mira love My Little Pony.

Wait…I don’t think that’s quite strong enough.

What I meant to say was: Cordy and Mira LOVE! LOVE! LOVE! My Little Pony. They can’t get enough of the new show on the Hub network, and our house is now filled with ponies and accessories. It’s nearly the only TV they watch.

Each year we let the girls pick a new ornament to add to the Christmas tree. It’s fun to see how their interests change each year by looking back at the ornaments they choose. So of course when it came time to select this year’s ornament (and knowing that this is the year of My Little Pony for both kids), I did a little internet searching and discovered that American Greetings made a 2011 My Little Pony Pinkie Pie Christmas ornament.

Perfect!

One problem, though. The ornament was sold out everywhere. It seems My Little Pony has an enormous adult fan following, and once word got out about the ornaments, they were quickly bought up. Sold out online. Sold out in our local stores, too.

I looked at resellers to buy one, but I refused to get into a bidding war on eBay and spend $30+ on a $7.99 ornament. I didn’t want to reward someone for buying up all the ornaments to turn a profit with the collector crowd.

So I did what any desperate blogger might think to do – I reached out via Twitter, asking American Greetings for their help in tracking down an ornament. I explained that my two daughters are fans of the show and really wanted this ornament for our Christmas tree this year.

I was hoping they might be able to tell me if there was somewhere online to buy one, or if they planned to send out another shipment soon. I was happy to pay for one, I just needed an actual ornament to buy. They quickly responded that they would look into it for me.

I waited for days and didn’t hear anything further. I wasn’t sure how much they could help – if it’s sold out, it’s sold out, right? So I was completely unprepared for them to go above and beyond and respond with this:

And then yesterday, a perfect Pinkie Pie ornament showed up in the mail. Two little girls cheered with joy and Cordy declared the @amgreetings Twitter maven “the nicest person in the world!”

The dreary, rainy day yesterday suddenly got A LOT brighter for these two.

So now Pinkie Pie has joined the cast of animated characters on our tree. As befitting her importance at this moment, she’s front and center:

with Batman climbing up for a visit on the lower right

Have I mentioned social media is awesome? Thank you, American Greetings, for helping this mom get the perfect 2011 ornament for my daughters!

(And just because this is the new era of full disclosure: yes, American Greetings did send it to us for free, unexpectedly. There was no agreed on review or anything like that – I just wanted to share my joy at a company doing something really, really nice for my family.)



Not A Cover Girl, But Still Special

Locals might want to pick up a (free) copy of Columbus Parent Magazine before the end of the month. While Cordy didn’t win the cover model contest, she was one of the five finalists, which means if you get this month’s issue you’ll have the chance to see this:

Sure, they got her age wrong, but it’s exciting to see a photo of our warrior princess in print!

Hurry to get your copy before I grab every last one to give to family. (And stash several in a memory box!)

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