Tales of one woman stumbling her way through motherhood.
Take one four year old with a thick head of curly hair that has reached unmanageable lengths and become heavy and sweaty:
Cut off about this much hair while she’s distracted watching Animaniacs:
And voila! A lighter, less sweaty ‘do perfect for summer camp:
(Be thankful she has curly hair to hide how uneven the cut is. Mommy went to nursing school, not cosmetology school, but this particular four year old is unwilling to sit for a proper haircut.)
I was hoping for a first day of summer camp that would end with reports of “she did great!” and in some ways it did. But that statement was also followed with “until…”
Cordy’s camp ends at 1:30pm each day, and we arranged it so she stays in after-camp until 3:30 three days a week. She’ll be in all-day Pre-K in the fall, and she needs to start getting used to a longer day. I figured this was a good place to start. This morning I met her after-camp teacher, and after warning her that Cordy would likely be having a rough day today, her response? “Oh, I’ve cared for lots of kids and I’ve seen everything! There’s no kid I can’t handle!”
Today, at 1:45pm, I got the call from Aaron’s aunt. (The preschool director.) At the end of camp, they took Cordy to the front along with the other kids who were leaving at 1:30. She got to watch them leave while she was told she had to remain behind. Today she was the only kid in after-care. Naturally, she had a big meltdown. They were calling to ask me for advice on getting her out of her meltdown. I gave a few tips and hung up, my stomach in knots as I wondered if I’d get another call soon.
Half an hour went by, and I called back to see if she had calmed down. Aaron’s aunt said Cordy and her teacher took a walk to calm her down. I decided at this point to get her early, since it was her first day. When I arrived, they sent someone to find Cordy and her teacher. As they came around the corner, Cordy had a big grin on her face and didn’t seem distressed at the moment.
I hugged Cordy and asked her how her day was. It was then her after-care teacher said, “She is very tired and worn out. Camp is hard on her.” Cordy seemed a little tired, but nothing out of the ordinary to me.
And then the gut punch: “I really think you should pick her up right after camp each day.”
*blink* *blink*
“Well, I can’t do that,” I stammered, “I’ve already paid for her after-care, and I need the time while she’s gone to get things done.”
The teacher was unimpressed. “The camp day is too hard on her. She can’t handle a full day. And she has no other kids to play with.”
I’d like to pause in this conversation to remind everyone: FIRST DAY, PEOPLE!!!
I explained to the teacher that Cordy doesn’t know the routine at the moment, and that once she gets the hang of it she’ll handle transitions better. I also told her Cordy will be in Pre-K in the fall and needs to start transitioning to a full-day program. And I had been told right before they came around the corner that another child would be in after-camp next week.
“Well, we’ll see what happens on Wednesday…” And with that ending, she left.
We’ll see? Or what, she’ll be kicked out of after-camp? Holy hell, it’s only been one day! ONE DAY. Un dia.
Surely other kids act up on the first day of a new program. A child need not be on the spectrum to have a bad day, right? You can’t judge kids by their first day in camp.
I’m completely floored by this teacher’s response to Cordy. Especially since she was the teacher who declared herself some kind of child whisperer that can handle anything. I can’t decide if my mistake was in not telling her enough about what to expect from Cordy, or telling her anything at all and somehow biasing her against Cordy. Was I wrong to mention autism? I feel like we’re being scolded for thinking we could mainstream her. She doesn’t act like a perfect robot child, and so clearly she doesn’t belong here. Send her back to the land of misfit children where she belongs.
And strangely enough, when I spoke with her camp teacher, the report was the complete opposite. Her camp teacher loved her, and said that Cordy had a really good day. She didn’t like circle time singing, preferring to stand away from the group, and she clung to her swim instructor like a barnacle in the pool, but otherwise she had a lot of fun and followed directions. Her teacher was impressed at how she coped with her new schedule.
And that whole talk about being too tired? Cordy did look a little worn out, but she wasn’t sleepy. She didn’t nap the entire day, and was a bundle of energy when we got home.
We’ll see what happens on Wednesday, but I’ll be pissed if I again hear that Cordy should not be in after-camp care. I know my daughter is pretty amazing, and I know she’ll go on to earn many honors, but having the title of “Fastest ejection from a daycare” is an honor I’d rather she not have. Because I then might have to earn the title of “Loudest mother” for shouting HAVE A LITTLE FREAKIN’ PATIENCE! at her teacher. Which is still better than “Mother drinking herself into oblivion” from the stress of it all.
So I hate to sound like a broken record, but I’m really sick of this recession. It was just over a year ago that Aaron was laid off from his state job, and it’s been three months since the contract job ended. We’ve done well at living on the small unemployment checks, food assistance and a little help from my mom. We still have our house, we haven’t had to sell anything major to pay the bills, and we still get the occasional night out or treat for ourselves.
But the constant worry grates on me. It takes one illness, one accident, one car breakdown to throw us into panic. Our tax return from last year gave us an extra cushion for a few months, but now it’s gone and we’re back to carefully juggling the bills to make sure everything gets paid. We’re still OK, although I hate living so close to the edge.
Aaron has applied for several jobs, but has only had one interview, thanks to a friend of ours who works for the same company. Our friend assured us that Aaron is currently the top pick for the job, but we’re still waiting for that call back. And we don’t even know how much it will pay – it’s a mail room job that he is overqualified for, but hopefully he could advance quickly.
And as of Friday I’m officially a nursing school graduate (well, I’ve completed all the graduation requirements, but the ceremony is on Friday). Time to go out and find one of those plentiful nursing jobs, right? See, when I first started nursing school, we were told how nurses were in demand, and local hospitals were offering $5000 hiring bonuses. Two years later? Not so much. Now there are hiring freezes, cutbacks, and no one wants a new grad nurse.
My one lead, also thanks to a connection, is sitting in limbo at the moment. They like me, and I think they want to hire me, but their HR won’t let them hire a nurse until he/she has a license. Taking the exam for my license won’t happen until the end of June or early July at the earliest due to paperwork processing between the school and the Board of Nursing. They likely need the position filled sooner than that, however, so I may not have a chance.
I’m still applying at several other hospitals, too, even those outside of Columbus. It’s a shame I’m not willing to move – there are other states that still have a nursing shortage.
In my ideal world, Aaron and I will both get jobs soon, we’ll be lifted out of this financial limbo, and we can pay off our debts and get back to a more stable life. Where I won’t have to check the checking account daily, worry if we have enough to pay the bills that month, or go to Once Upon A Child to sell kids’ clothing to help cover those bills. I won’t have to be the cheap mom who avoids birthday parties and weddings so we won’t need to buy a gift. Where I can buy a bottle of decent wine once in a while without feeling guilty about it.
And I’m wishing the same good fortune for so many other friends who are in similar situations. Being struck down by financial weakness sucks.
I do believe that everything in life happens for a reason. I think I’ve learned a lot from this experience, but now I’m ready to move on to a place that isn’t so close to the bumper and front wheels of the karma bus.
Last night, as I was coming home from a night out with friends, I was treated to an amazing light show in the sky. Great, I thought, storms. Those who know me in person know how anxious I get in thunderstorms. I’ve never been able to relax and enjoy the power of nature. No, I’m too focused on the massive destruction, tornadoes, fires, and electrocution that nature can cause to enjoy some pretty lights in the sky.
I made it home right before the rain started. Settling down in my chair with my computer, I distracted myself with a quick e-mail check and some Twitter, hoping the storm would pass quickly.
And then the lights dimmed, came back, dimmed again, and then went out. No big crack of thunder accompanied it, so we didn’t know why the power decided to take time off.
Aaron found the flashlights while I looked outside and confirmed that everyone was in the dark. After our initial WTF? we lit some candles and relaxed. The rain was steady, the lightening was already calming down – so where was our electricity?
We waited. And waited. And waited. I called my mom and she asked “Did you call the electric company yet?”
“Um, no, but considering most of our side of town is dark, I’m guessing they already know.”
My only worry at this point was Cordy. If she woke up during this power outage, she would freak out. Cordy is afraid of the dark, and usually sleeps with her light on all night. A night light doesn’t cut it, and if I turn off her overhead light after she’s asleep, she’ll get up and turn it back on later in the night, along with her lamp. (And keep the nightlight on too, of course.) Thank goodness for CFL bulbs or environmentalists would have her on their 10 Most Wanted list.
Eventually we gave up and went to bed. Well, I went to bed, Aaron slept on the couch so he could turn everything off when the power came back on.
Sure enough, at 11:45pm, just as I was drifting off to sleep, I was startled awake by a scream from Cordy’s room. “I can’t get the lights on! I can’t see! I can’t see!” I fell out of bed in my frantic scurry to get to her room, trying to open and turn on my Nintendo DSi to provide light for her. When I opened her door, she was completely disoriented and terrified, shaking and reaching out for the light source while babbling about lights not working and make them work again and it’s dark and scary!
Aaron made it to the top of the stairs about the same time that I opened her door, and we guided her into our bedroom. I told her she could sleep in our bed tonight, and Aaron brought in her Sammy. (Somehow the giant Miffy that she named Sammy has become her nighttime protector and must be present so she can sleep.) With a child and giant stuffed rabbit in the bed, Aaron knew there was no room for him and went back to the couch.
At that point, all I wanted was to go back to sleep. I tried to close the DSi, but Cordy was again scared, even though I was right there with her. So I left it on, placing it on the bedside table. Then I remembered that I hadn’t charged it lately. Hmmm…once that light ran out, she’d be a mess again. I got out of bed to gather more light-producing equipment, and came up with a Nintendo DS and a book light. Well, it was better than nothing.
Thankfully, the lights came on 10 minutes after that. But Cordy refused to go back to her room. “What if the lights stop working again?” she asked over and over. I assured her that I would come and get her if they went off again, but she wouldn’t budge. As long as there was the statistical probability of the lights not working again, she was not moving.
Cordy hasn’t slept in our bed in a long, long time, and she’s not the best bed-mate. She talks half the night, kicks, fidgets, tosses and turns, and does her best to make sure no one else is sleeping. And is then up at 6am on her knees with open arms proclaiming, “Good morning, sun!” to the light coming in the window.
So if any locals happen to see me today, please buy me a coffee. And hope that she returns to her bed tonight.
This brown thumb has now
somehow coaxed from the earth a
bunch of broccoli:
And those are just the
first of the season – more will
be coming later
My first garden is already a smashing success as far as I’m concerned. I love broccoli, and these were transplanted in mid-April to the fledgling garden. I didn’t expect to see results so quickly, but we had to take the heads off of each plant today to make room for the new stalks of broccoli growing underneath.
We also planted carrot, cucumber, and sunflower seeds today. I already planted sweet peppers, lettuce, and some herbs a few weeks ago, and I still need to plant zucchini and green beans. I don’t know if they’ll all be as successful as the broccoli that even I can’t kill, but I hope we’ll have plenty of our own veggies this summer.
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Tech geek, wife, mom of two, Disney fanatic, woman with ADD, and a complete domestic zero. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, but that's not so bad when you get to keep trying new things, right?
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