Haiku Friday: Small Victories

Haiku Friday
Tonight, we fought the
“man”, and we won! Well, we got
a short extension.

A few weeks ago
we found the land behind ours
could possibly change

Instead of single
homes, they wanted to change the
zoning: apartments.

Two large apartment
buildings would be placed twenty-
five feet from our yard.

“Oh hell no!” we cried
and went to the meeting to
voice our discontent

We were not alone.
Others complained about the
trouble it would bring.

The committee heard
us, and tabled the vote for
further discussion.

When we found out the developer who owns the land directly behind us wanted to change the zoning from single-family homes to apartments, we were furious, but also felt helpless. How could we stop it? But anger won out, and I decided we needed to go to this zoning meeting, voice our concerns, and ask them to deny the request. I was terrified, to be honest.

Good thing we went. After hearing our complaints, plus the complaints from others bordering the property, the committee told the developer that the request needed to be tabled until our complaints could be addresses and some compromise could be reached. We spoke with the developer afterward, and despite some loud arguing from some of those involved, it was decided that we would schedule a meeting to try to discuss alternatives that would make everyone happy.

This also gives us time to mobilize other neighbors who would be affected, too. The developer had assured those surrounding the property that it would only build single-family homes when it first started. If everyone surrounding the property refuses to allow apartments, I’d imagine we can block this rezoning from happening entirely. It’s possible we’ll find a compromise, but any attempt to put large 12 unit apartment buildings directly behind my backyard will be met with fierce resistance. And after our “win” tonight, I’m feeling completely energized and ready to rally the neighborhood to make sure our properties are protected.

Lesson learned: Stand up for yourself, your family and your home, or you let someone else choose your future.

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REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will delete any links without haiku!



Holiday Hangover

Like many others, my mind is still in a haze, recovering from the holiday marathon. Three more containers of brisket remain until I’m finished with the leftovers and guaranteed to never want to see brisket again until next December. Other highlights:

* Both girls stayed awake for all holiday gatherings this year, two of which lasted past 9 pm. This is especially impressive for Cordy, who can rarely stay awake past 8 pm.

* Starbucks gift cards really are some of the best gifts out there. Nothing says love like the gift of sweet, hot caffeine. Restaurant gift cards (especially to restaurants that don’t have crayons) fall closely behind that. Cash trumps everything, of course.

* For the first time in several years, my mom did not stay with us on Christmas Eve. And for the first time in several years, Aaron and I slept without clothing on Christmas Eve. Yay, naked!

* The best part of Hanukkah falling over Christmas? You can hit the post-Christmas sales for any remaining Hanukkah gifts.

* The girls looked great in their dresses. Cordy loves her fancy dress and asks to wear it every day now. Had I actually paid for it, she probably would wear it every day to make it worth it. Still, it’s a gorgeous dress on her.


* No one was sick!

* I found out more family members read my blog than I originally thought. So to all of you who revealed yourselves last week: hi, welcome to my blog, and I’m glad you like it. Don’t be afraid to leave a comment now and then, OK? And I really can’t be held responsible if you read anything that is TMI for you (see third * above), so read at your own risk.

*Cordy picked a bad time of the year to learn new profanity. When told she couldn’t do something, she sighed in her saddest voice, “Aw, fuckers…” Wonder where she learned that word, Aaron?

* Little girls in their PJs and tutus are really cute.


* I’m thrilled that a large part of our holiday shopping came from small, independent shops. Gifts for Aaron’s family were purchased at the annual Winterfair craft show in Columbus, including a nice pen with a wooden case, a handwoven purse, and some dip mixes that are incredibly delicious. Mira scored with two dresses from Etsy:


Cute, aren’t they? Had we more money this year, Etsy sellers would have seen a lot more of my cash. Given the choice, I’d rather purchase something made by hand by a small-time business owner than something mass produced and probably made in a foreign country by children who should be spending their time in school or just, you know, being kids.

Which brings up another topic: have you seen the Help Save Handmade campaign? To sum up, a new act going into effect very soon would require all children’s products to undergo government lab testing before they could be sold. Despite the fact that the larger manufacturers are the more likely culprits of using dangerous materials or construction, this would require small-time crafters to pay the thousands of dollars for testing for each item – a cost most couldn’t afford, for products that are already made from natural materials.

If you haven’t already, read up on the issues, vote on change.org, join in the handmande meme, and get involved in contacting Congress and the CPSC to protest this act. Most of all, continue to support handmade businesses – many of which are started by moms and dads who want kids to have quality toys and clothing – so that our kids can continue to get cool handmade gifts every Christmas.



Giving and Getting

Today I loaded up the back of our Hyundai with several items for the Columbus YWCA family shelter. My goal was to pay forward some of the generosity that an anonymous friend had passed on to me, and so with a handful of $20’s in hand, I went to Target yesterday and bought as much as I could.

diapers and formula = expensive

I also added a Mrs. Goodbee dollhouse. When I did a review for this dollhouse, I was sent two of them, with the intention that I would give the second away to an organization that can use it. The YWCA has an on-site childcare center and the dollhouse will be a perfect addition there.

Finally, knowing they were in need of all baby items, including basics like baby shampoo and lotion, I thought I’d send a quick request to Johnson & Johnson to ask if they would like to donate anything. When I went to their Camp Baby event in April, I was impressed by their presentation about J&J’s involvement in community projects and charity works. Asking for a donation was worth a shot, right?

Totally worth trying.

And they didn’t disappoint – despite the distribution center being in a blackout period, Lori and Alex put together a box full of J&J baby products and sent it out quickly so I could add it to the donation. They have my gratitude for taking the time to support this family shelter, all at the request of a B-minus-at-best blogger. (BTW, J&J has a blog, too.)

When I brought everything to the shelter today, it was full of residents spending time in the community area. Kids aren’t in school right now, so several kids were trying to run off their energy as best they could indoors. I heard babies crying from all corners of the room.

As one of the shelter workers helped me bring everything inside, a few boys caught sight of the dollhouse and came running, their mouths and eyes open wide in amazement. Several people gave soft cheers as the diapers and formula wheeled past them. Each person I saw met my gaze with one of equal kindness and warmth.

The staff were thrilled to see the J&J box and told me the diapers were needed right away. They were very busy, so I quickly filled out the necessary paperwork, shyly accepted one more round of thanks, and left. Had I the time, I think I would be content to spend an hour or two there chatting with the residents, but sadly my day was far too busy to stay today.

I think the YWCA family shelter will be seeing more of me – I’m adopting it as my charity for the next year, and will do what I can to help provide supplies.

Thanks again to J&J and to my anonymous giver – you helped me make this cold month a little better for so many others, which is one of the best gifts I could give – and get.

(And that feeling of goodwill helped dull the blow that came later in the day when I found out our girls are losing their health insurance. Aaron’s contract job makes more than the monthly limit to qualify for the state’s children’s health insurance, even though it’s only a 2-3 month contract and if you look at our yearly income we’ll more than qualify. Once the contract ends we can go through the reapplication process. Bureaucracy can #suckit.)



Even the "Relatively Healthy" Have Problems Getting Health Insurance

Now that Aaron has this (ever-so-temporary) contract job, we thought it might be nice to have some health insurance again for the two of us. I researched all of the private insurance plans out there, mostly disgusted with 1. how expensive they were and 2. how little they covered. I finally chose one that seemed to be a good balance of cost vs. coverage.

When I first spoke with a customer service rep, I expressed concern that they would try to stick us with a bunch of riders to prevent coverage for anything useful. She assured me that as long as Aaron and I were relatively healthy people, there probably would be few changes from our medical review.

Apparently we differ in our definition of “relatively healthy”.

I provided a very thorough medical history for both of us, leaving out nothing. Every detail was included, from lab values to drug lists. I considered us relatively healthy. I can’t remember the last time Aaron went to the doctor for something other than an annual physical. I’ve had some minor problems (moles removed, sinus surgery, etc.), and we’ve both had minor issues with depression.

They insisted on bloodwork for Aaron because it had been over a year since his last physical. A nice tech came out to our house to do the bloodwork, remaining vague on if we will ever see the numbers. After waiting two weeks to find out the state of our health insurance (while they were still taking money from our bank account, of course), we finally received the offical certificate.

Included with the certificate were several riders. We were both denied any mental health coverage, including medications. (Note to others: if your doctor offers you antidepressants for anything, give serious thought to taking them. If you’re ever forced to pay for private insurance, you might be denied or limited based on this one decision.) Anything dealing with previous conditions wouldn’t be covered for 6 months. I would have to pay a $500 deductible for any prescription medications instead of the standard $150. And Aaron was completely denied any prescription drug benefits.

That last one puzzled me, so I called for clarification. “Well, they probably denied him because he is taking a very expensive medication.”

“But he’s not taking anything at the moment.”

“Oh, well, he must have taken expensive medications in the past then.”

“Nope. He’s taken one prescription medication, and it’s the one I’m currently on, and I wasn’t denied.”

“Well, then, there must be some other reason that they determined he was a poor financial risk for prescription medications.”

“I’m confused. He doesn’t take any medications, and prefers to not take them unless necessary. My history, on the other hand, shows I’m a walking formulary of drugs, yet I’m still being offered benefits.”

She paused and I could hear the clicking of computer keys. “It’s possible he was denied prescription benefits based on his bloodwork.”

I explained that I needed to know the results of that test, and was promptly told no. I applied a little more pressure, and convinced her to at least tell me what values were outside of normal. But she would not give me the actual numbers, so really, the information was pretty useless. I mean, one point over normal is nothing but would still result in a high reading, but way over the normal values would be more serious.

I was told that I could submit $25 and a written request to a mailing address and might get a copy of the results. Apparently since they paid for the test, the insurance company isn’t required to release the results to us. Screwed up, isn’t it? I’m hoping we can get the results to determine if there’s anything we should be concerned about.

(Which, if he does have a problem, how jacked is our insurance system that they would rather treat more serious (or life-threatening) complications of a condition via hospitalization rather than pay for the medication to keep it from becoming serious?)

We decided after all of the limitations, we’d be paying $300 a month for practically nothing. I canceled the policy and will instead put that same amount of money into a savings account each month. Contrary to the insurance company’s belief, we’re both relatively healthy and will likely not need much in the next 6 months. (Knocking on wood furiously…) At that point I’ll graduate and will hopefully find a job with full benefits again. (Wait – need more wood to knock on now…)

If we do need anything, there are Minute Clinics and the like that charge a small amount to get minor illnesses taken care of. Our doctors will also accept a smaller cash payment to be seen.

I never thought buying private health insurance would be so difficult. Makes nationalized health care look dreamy. (I’m looking at you, Canada.) Here’s hoping the next administration can figure out a solution – or at least the beginning of a solution – to our screwed up system.



No Surprises

Early on Saturday morning, two women showed up at our door with folders of papers and a little tackle box full of toys. They were here to do the full evaluation on Mira’s developmental progress. As they walked in, Cordy gave a loud “happy Halloween!” greeting to them (she still hasn’t figured out that Halloween is over), and Mira peered at them from behind my legs.

Aaron took Cordy upstairs for a bath so she wouldn’t disturb the evaluation, and I sat down on the floor with them as they began with a basic puzzle of two shapes and the holes to put them in. Mira quickly figured it out, but refused to take them back out of the puzzle and give them to the occupational therapist (OT).

When she put a Cheerio in a little bottle and handed it to Mira, she quickly turned it upside down to get the Cheerio out. But before the OT could say, “Now put it back in the bottle” Mira had already shoved it in her mouth. She took out another Cheerio and gave it to Mira, this time getting as far as “Can you put it in-” before Mira again popped it into her mouth. The third Cheerio was eaten as well. That’s my girl – she likes to eat.

She did pretty well on gross motor skills and fine motor skills, so the primary focus became communication. The speech therapist asked me several questions about how I interacted with her – do I repeat words, do I correct her if she mispronounces something, do I ask her to say what she wants when she points to it? In short, do I actually bother to talk to my child? Well, of course I do. I’m a blogger – I’m full of words.

None of the questions bothered me, until I was asked, “Has she said the typical first words? Mama, dada?” I looked down at Mira with a touch of sadness. “No, she has yet to say those.”

They both tried to persuade her to talk, but other than a few “nooo”s and some squeals and shrieks when they tried to make her do something she didn’t want to do, she remained mute. She also refused to play along with many of their games – a trait that seems to run in our family. After 45 minutes, they packed everything up, said they would need to score her evaluation at the office, and unceremoniously left. My only regret is that she didn’t smile or laugh for them even once, just gave them her icy stare. She’s really a goofy kid, but it’s a side of her that she refuses to show to strangers.

The call came this evening. Based on their evaluation, they’ve determined that Mira has a speech delay and will begin receiving therapy for it. They were especially concerned with her expressive language, but also a little concerned with her receptive language. I’m sure the receptive language perception was due to her disinterest in their games, because she responds to many things I tell her to do. OK, not that many – she does choose to ignore me when she doesn’t want to hear what I’m saying.

After we got the news, Aaron and I looked at each other and shrugged. There were no surprises here. We know she doesn’t talk, and that otherwise she’s a fairly typical 18 month old. As I’ve said before, compared to what we’ve already gone through with Cordy, this doesn’t seem all that bad. Even if Mira never speaks (practically impossible, I know), she’s a bright girl who knows how to get her message across. She has the will and temperment to demand anything she wants in life, even without saying a word. This is nothing more than a bump in the road.

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