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Mar 5, 2012

Things To Do While Unemployed

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I’m taking the elimination of my job amazingly well. Or at least that’s what everyone is telling me. People look at me awkwardly, asking how I’m dealing with the news, and I just smile and say, “I’m fine.” And then they give me that sad look that tells me they think I’m being so strong in hiding my pain, so I have to follow up with, “No, really! Do you know how much I can get done without my job getting in my way and sucking up all my energy?”

Not an optimist, folks. Just a realist.

But c’mon – if I’m going to be unemployed (hopefully for only a very short while), why NOT plan out all of the projects, chores, and wish lists I’ve wanted to tackle for so long but never had the time for? I feel like I’ve suddenly got the entire world in front of me, with limitless directions to take.

Here’s just a few of the items I’ve started writing in a notebook (three pages now, people!) that I can now do with my time, in no particular order:

For home:
Make a greater dent in the laundry, get rid of clothing that no longer fits, de-clutter every room in the house, clean out the garage, put up the shelf I just bought from Ikea, take down the kitchen table & replace with the larger crate for Cosmo (this dog is getting too big), vacuum more often, learn to paint with the help of Pinterest and YouTube, paint a few rooms, get some kind of filing system up and running to keep papers under control, dust (for once), and more…

For the family:
Volunteer for my daughters’ classrooms, pick Cordy up from school some days so she doesn’t spend 1.5 hours on the bus, take Mira to preschool each day so Aaron doesn’t have to be late for work, learn to cook with Pinterest and blogs (I’m trusting you, food-bloggers!), cook meals occasionally without poisoning my family, decorate my daughters’ rooms with input from them, help Cordy with her homework, read more with Mira and take the time to teach her how to read, take the dog for walks, make doctor and dentist appointments that I’ve been too busy to make and then go to them, pay attention when Mira tries to tell me something that is so important to her, listen to Cordy’s stories, cuddle with Aaron on the couch and spend time together and not just in the same room, sign Mira up for gymnastics or ice skating and take her to classes, and more…

For me:
Sleep at night again, next to my husband (!!!!), go the gym more, blog more, use my gift cards to have a facial or massage, get acquainted with my sewing machine again and find my way back into sewing, play video games, visit with friends, re-do my blog template, play with my fancy camera, catch up on Downton Abbey (I’m only a few episodes into season one), blast loud music in the living room and dance around like a fool when no one is home, reorganize my Pinterest boards, do something with my Facebook fan page, meditate, read a book or two, say yes to more product reviews for small businesses I want to support, knit, and (you guessed it) more…

Whew!

Looking at that list, I’m kinda amazed at how behind I am on things. I should have found myself a stay-at-home wife years ago to help me get all this done! 

Did you read it all? I admit, it’s a long list, and I seem to find new things to add to it each day. And of course there will be a half hour or more set aside each day to check the job boards and look for any opportunities that would be a good fit for me, or network with friends who might know of good jobs. (This has already been happening and so far is very promising!)

I feel so free knowing the long hours of my night shift are at an end. I’ve worked an overnight shift for years now; seeing the sunshine and enjoying my weekends without being in a sleepy fog will be refreshing. If you’ve never worked overnights for an extended period of time, you have no idea how it affects your body and mind. No matter how much you try to convince your body that night is day, and buy blackout shades to have some darkness during the day while you sleep, it still knows. Oh, it knows, and hates you all the more for it.

Maybe I’ll even blog some of the adventures I’ve listed above? I’ve been so removed from the domestic scene for so long that it could be comedy gold.

I doubt I’ll get to everything on my lists. But I’m actually excited at having the ability to tackle them.

Filed Under: clearly insane, domestic zero, me me me, the J-O-B ·


Mar 1, 2012

A Crazy Example of Great Service

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I had one other amazing experience during Blissdom that I wanted to share, but decided that it needed its own post.

As I mentioned previously, Blissdom was held at the Gaylord Opryland resort, which I often refer to as a city under a Bio-Dome. But ultimately it is a luxury hotel focused on providing high-quality service and creating a memorable experience for each guest.

I’ve been to Opryland three years in a row now. On my first visit, I remember walking into our hotel room and hearing this lovely music playing. It was similar to what you might hear if you went for a massage at a high-end spa. I looked at our clock radio and discovered it was also a sound machine. And the sound playing at the time was “spa” of course.

After a long drive to Nashville, the gentle wood flute and nature sounds were so soothing that I nearly fell asleep while relaxing on my bed. That entire weekend, I continued to notice how relaxed I felt while that music was softly playing in our room.

Before we left the conference that year, I asked the hotel where I could get one of those clock radios. They didn’t sell them but told me I’d be likely to find them in any store. I copied down the model number, but was never able to find one in stores that had the “spa” sounds. It seems that the model in the hotel room was only made for Gaylord hotels.

The next year, the clock radio in our room was a newer model – replaced after the great flood of Nashville – but the new one still had the soothing spa music. I again asked where I could find one, but nobody had an answer for me. I took down the model number and tried to search for it, but came up empty handed again.

Yes, I know you probably think I’m insane to obsess over a clock radio. And to be honest I’m not as obsessed as I sound. While I’m at Opryland, I enjoy the spa music. Sound can influence our thoughts and feelings, and this particular track soothes my mind, calms my nerves, and lets me sleep deeper than I usually do at home. I occasionally see sound machines at the store and when I do I always check to see if they might have the one I’m looking for. But I don’t spend every day in the quest for this particular clock radio.

So THIS year, I once again arrived at Gaylord Opryland and was pleased to find my little happy machine in the room. I joked with my roommate, Lisa, that I might just need to ask Opryland how much they’d charge me if our clock radio happened to be missing from the room at the end of our stay. I didn’t want to be a thief (bad message to send to the kids, right?), but I’ve been trying to find a product like this for three years now.

I turned to Twitter to ask the hotel for help.

And they responded. (Because they’re cool like that. And smart enough to watch their Twitter feed during a blogging conference.)

And then I responded:

I received no response after that, and I attended the Blissdom closing night party with the subject no longer on my mind. When we came back to the room, I walked over to the nightstand and switched on the music again, then turned and found myself face-to-faceplate with a second clock radio perched on the dresser, and an envelope next to it with my name on it.

(Photo re-enacted after I’d already opened the card, of course.)

There was at least a five second pause as my brain tried to process what my eyes were seeing. I slowly picked up the envelope and opened it, reading the handwritten card: “Christina, Thank you for following us on Twitter. We hope you enjoy these spa sounds at home. If you need anything, please let us know. Sincerely, Elizabeth, Nick & Tori.”

That would be the point where the excited screaming began. Sorry to those of you staying in the Delta who were trying to sleep at 11:30pm.

I would have been happy to pay for one of the clock radios, but the staff at Opryland took notice of just how much I loved this thing and went out of their way to make sure I had the best experience ever. And they also ensured that I wouldn’t have a guilty conscience when returning home to my daughters.

(Kidding.)

(Well, mostly.)

(No, no, really. Stealing is bad, kids.)

So thank you, Gaylord Opryland (Elizabeth, Tori & Nick!), for topping off a wonderful weekend with an unexpected delight. You reaffirmed that there are still companies out there focused on great service, and you’ve made a lifelong fan out of me. And you’re now helping me get some of the best sleep possible, year-round, which any mother will tell you is a feat worthy of high praise.

You’ll have to pry this thing from my cold, dead (yet amazingly relaxed) hands.
Filed Under: Blissdom, clearly insane, me me me, people who don't suck · Tagged:


Feb 28, 2012

Blissdom 2012: A New Perspective Changes Everything

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Never did I need a weekend away from my normal life as I did this past weekend. As I sat down on the plane going to Nashville (for Blissdom) I pondered what I hoped to get from the next four days. Of course I wanted to catch up with friends I haven’t seen in months. I also wanted a break from kids and work to focus on myself a little and maybe even have some fun. I was open to meeting new bloggers and discovering like-minded souls. And I was hoping that somehow, something or someone would speak to my heart and mind to help me find new direction in my life.

Folks, I’m happy to report: I got it all.

To begin, it’s hard to be unhappy when you’re in the Gaylord Opryland. It’s a giant structure that can best be described as a city under a Bio-Dome. The weather is always perfect, the trees are always green, the flowers are always blooming, and the river (yes, there’s an indoor river) is always crystal clear.

The view from my hotel room window and yes, it’s all indoors.

There was some whining on my part during the conference. After all, I was having one big pity party for myself over being out of work soon. But that’s where good friends stepped in, reminding me of my talents and distracting me from dwelling on the unpleasant. They engaged me in long conversations, had me gasping for air from laughter, kept me company when I was feeling down, and fed me delicious homemade brownies that would make you cry tears of joy. (Really, Michelle, they were incredible.) The conference was a beautiful excuse to spend time with friends that are normally separated by thousands of miles.

The opening keynote by Jon Acuff was one of those lightbulb moments you hear people talk about. His talk was about closing the gap between your day job and your dream job, and while I’m generally not into deeply inspirational speakers, this felt like he was speaking directly to me. I realized I haven’t felt all that passionate about my job, while I’ve been neglecting the very things I am passionate about because of my job. I’m too tired to blog as much as I used to, I haven’t done anything crafty in years, and I feel like I’m constantly letting my family down due to being stretched too thin. I’ve lost all my passion.

I came away from that keynote re-energized with a new perspective on my situation. This is a gift. Having my job eliminated is the universe’s way of removing all barriers that have kept me stationary for so long, freeing me up to find that passion and pursue it. Of course, the hard part is determining exactly what that passion is, but I’m ready to do the work to discover it. 

(If you want more from Jon Acuff, check out his book, Quitter.)

Did I have fun? Oh yes. There was dancing and drinking and long chats with others while sitting on the lobby floor. There were comfy shoes:

(Dr Scholl’s shoes)

And meeting famous people:

Err…I mean, the Lorax.

And, of course, silliness with Joe Jonas behind us:

Voted least likely to be seen at a Joe Jonas concert. (With @mizzjenny)

I met lots of new people, of course. Unless you’re completely anti-social, it’s hard to go to a blogging conference and not meet new people. Some were complete strangers, others were introduced by friends, and several are people I plan to stay in touch with and learn more from.

On the last day of the conference, Cecily introduced me to Amber, who then offered to take a headshot of me as part of a project she was working on. I was truly honored by the request, and while hesitant at first (I hadn’t brushed my teeth since before lunch, I looked tired, my makeup needed a touch-up, it wasn’t my best outfit, etc etc etc…) I finally got up the guts to agree to it.

The result? Amber is a talented photographer, and captured a portrait (totally worth the click!) just as good as any that Nigel Barker could take. I look at that photo and immediately notice the effect the previous days had on me. Yes, I’m tired, and my lips really needed a little more color, but so much of the stress and worry and unhappiness is gone from my face. I’m relaxed, at peace, and ready for my next adventure.

And I think that was my takeaway from Blissdom. I found peace and enjoyed the happiness brought on by being surrounded by so many talented and inspiring women. They make me want to do more and be better.

Now to figure out how to do that.

Filed Under: big issues, Blissdom, geek paradise, me me me, memories, the J-O-B ·


Feb 21, 2012

Change of Plans

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The last seven days have been a mountain of stress for me. Just when everything was swimming along nicely in my life, it was announced that my shift is being eliminated at work in two weeks. I’m unsure yet as to what this will mean for my employment overall, but you can imagine how news like this can affect you emotionally. Especially when you just had new living room furniture delivered to your house the weekend before, with a large credit card bill coming due.

The first day I was in shock. When I was given the news that morning, I couldn’t sleep. (I work nights, in case you’re new here.) Once I did get a few hours of troubled sleep, I woke up and couldn’t even face the idea of dinner with my family. You KNOW I’m upset if I can’t eat.

I barely ate the next few days as well. The reality slowly sunk in, and while the shock has worn off, the uncertainty at the moment is still very present. It will likely be a few more days before I’ll know the future of my current job situation.

Suddenly the five stages of grief makes sense to me. I went through denial and anger already, and while bargaining doesn’t really make sense in this situation, I know depression is just around the corner. Here’s where I get worried, because depression rarely shows up at my door without a bag of powdered donuts, a pint of ice cream and an extra large spoon. (And as an adult depression also usually brings a box o’ wine along as well, making sure to get the most alcohol for the value. Depression is thrifty like that.)

At this time, I’m thankful that Aaron has a job that he loves. I’m also thankful that his employer loves him as well. It wasn’t that long ago that Aaron was unemployed while I served as the breadwinner. I still make a little more, but Aaron’s job provides our health insurance and he has paid time off while I don’t. No matter what happens with my job, we can meet our essential bills and will still have health insurance.

It’s still unsettling. Any illusion of security that I thought I had was pulled out from under me. We had a lot planned for this year, and now all of it is in question. It hurts. My weekend was spent playing endless games of what if? as we tried to come to terms with this upcoming change and discuss what might happen next and how we’ll deal with it.

Before any of this happened, of course, I had planned to attend Blissdom later this week. I’m still going, and I honestly can’t wait to escape from this bad dream for a few days and immerse myself in blogging.

Stepping away from it all may help me clear my head and reach that final stage of grief: acceptance, of whatever the outcome might be.

Filed Under: Blissdom, daily life, me me me, the J-O-B ·


Feb 21, 2012

I Will Not Stress Eat

By ·

The last seven days have been a mountain of stress for me. Just when everything was swimming along in my life, it was announced that my shift is being eliminated at work. I’m unsure yet as to what this will mean for my employment overall, but you can imagine how news like this can affect you emotionally. Especially when you just had new living room furniture delivered to your house the weekend before, with a large credit card bill coming due.

The first day I was in shock. When I was given the news that morning, I couldn’t sleep. (I work nights, in case you’re new here.) Once I did get a few hours of troubled sleep, I woke up and couldn’t even face the idea of dinner with my family. It’s hard to think I’d ever be too upset to eat, but that was the case for the rest of the night.

I barely ate the next few days as well. The reality slowly sunk in, and while the shock has worn off, the uncertainty at the moment is still very present. It will likely be a few more days before I’ll know the future of my current job situation.

Suddenly the five stages of grief makes sense to me. I went through denial and anger already, and while bargaining doesn’t really make sense in this situation, I know depression is just around the corner. Here’s where I get worried, because depression rarely shows up at my door without a bag of powdered donuts, a pint of ice cream and an extra large spoon. (And as an adult depression also generally brings a box o’ wine along as well, making sure to get the most alcohol for the value. Depression is thrifty like that.)

Before this news hit last week, I was celebrating a new milestone. I finally broke through the 166 pound curse and had officially made it to 165. Since then I’ve dipped down to 164 and even saw 163.8 on Saturday morning. (But won’t officially count it since I know it was partially due to lack of eating while I lived in my head for a few days.) Breaking that plateau was such an accomplishment for me and gave me hope that by the end of my Slim-Fast challenge I’ll reach that goal I set of 158.

So I now find myself scared that all of this uncertainty will destroy the progress I’ve made and send me to the bottom of a fried-dough-and-sugar binge. No matter how much I’m told this job situation had nothing to do with our performance, I still feel like a failure. (Not helped by the news that most of the other two shifts were made company employees while I’ll remain a contractor if I still have a position.) The negative emotion cycle feeds into itself, with any slip on my part interpreted by my brain as more proof of my inability to succeed at anything, which then leads to more self-destruction.

This week’s challenge for myself is to resist the negative self-talk in my head and not give in to stress eating. No matter the outcome of this situation, I can’t let it affect all that I’ve worked for in my personal goals. I’m trying so hard to love myself and reshape myself into a model of good health, and I’m already 80 pounds from where I started.

Failing myself because of the business decisions of men in expensive suits sitting in fancy offices far removed from what I do would be silly. However, that extra large piece of chocolate cake looks like the perfect medication to soothe your soul when your feelings are hurt and depression is holding a chair for you and offering you a fork.

I can be stronger than this situation.

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