Real Safety or Scare Tactics?

You’ve probably heard a lot about the Texas governor signing an executive order, making it required for all girls in Texas to be vaccinated with the HPV vaccine Gardasil before entering sixth grade. The controversy surrounding it has spread to other states, and now a state representative in Ohio is proposing that Ohio follow the lead of Texas and require the vaccine for all girls here as well.

At our monthly Moms Night Out dinner, we discussed the issues surrounding this. I gave my opinion right up front: I’m completely, totally against any state legislation requiring this vaccine. The others seemed surprised by my answer, but I assured them it wasn’t based on moral issues.

I have no moral objections against this vaccine. The idea that it would encourage girls to become sexually active younger or would make it more likely for girls to practice unsafe sex is ridiculous to me. If I’m vaccinated against Hepatitis B, does that make me more likely to share needles with drug users? The threat of a relatively minor STD (yes, some strains lead to cancer, but young girls really don’t think about getting cancer) isn’t enough to scare a girl away from sex if she really wants to do it, especially when condoms are available. I think pregnancy would be more of a fear than HPV.

My objections with Gardasil mainly involve the rush this vaccine went through to get to market quickly, and the questionable ties being made between Merck, the vaccine manufacturer, and politicians.

Don’t get me wrong: A vaccine against the types of HPV that can cause cervical cancer is a great thing. Cervical cancer affects a relatively small number of women each year, far, far less than breast cancer, although it’s devastating if you happen to be one of those women.

However, the Gardasil commercials would lead you to believe that every woman who contracts HPV has a high chance of developing cervical cancer. There are over one hundred different strains of HPV – only a couple of them have been shown to have a connection with cervical cancer. So while this vaccine is a good thing, your actual chances of ever developing cervical cancer are small. Slightly better odds than winning the lottery, but far more likely to die from another cancer, heart disease, or just be killed in an accident.

The problem is once this vaccine was created, it was rushed out to market. No long term studies have been conducted to see if the vaccine’s effectiveness wanes after five years. Which means if the vaccine is given to girls entering sixth grade, roughly 11 years old, they could have no immunity to HPV by the time they are 16, an age when more girls are likely to become sexually active. And little research has been done to look for long-term side effects that may not appear until long after the vaccine is given.

Side note: the chicken pox vaccine, once thought to be a one-time shot, is already going down this path. It’s possible that boosters are required, although it was not known at the time it hit the market. Meaning some who are vaccinated as children may be immune as children, but then contract chicken pox as adults, when the virus is deadlier, especially to the fetus of a pregnant woman. Makes me think it’s better to go through the uncomfortable, yet mostly harmless, virus as a child, than take risks of becoming very ill as an adult.

The money issue can’t be ignored, either. Many already know the Texas governor had ties to Merck – ties involving a lot of money. But the millions of dollars Merck is throwing at states to convince them to make this vaccine mandatory, along with the millions put into advertising to convince the public that this is a necessary vaccine are important, too. Merck stands to make billions off of this vaccine, so of course they are pulling out every scare tactic possible to sway the public to their side. It’s the most expensive vaccine out there right now: $360, which isn’t covered by all insurances. States who make it mandatory would likely pick up the tab for the uninsured. Now multiple $360 times every girl entering sixth grade in several states, and you can see the incredible profit coming from this year after year.

As I said, I think the vaccine is a good thing. Yes, they are trying to make the largest profits they can, but Merck is a medical research organization that helps in finding new drugs to make us a healthier society. But the research for this particular immunization is not complete, and certainly not enough to warrant mandatory vaccination. At the moment, studies on Gardasil should continue, and the issue of whether or not to use the vaccine should be left to a patient and her doctor to decide together.

I went through my own cervical cancer scare when I was in my early 20’s. I had to undergo a biopsy, wait for results (which resulted in inconclusive abnormal cells, possibly pre-cancerous), and go for follow up checks every three months for over a year to make sure I was in the clear. It was a frightening process to be faced with the possibility of cancer while I was so young, and to come to terms with the fact that I might be unable to have children if cancerous cells did develop.

Would I have taken the vaccine if it was available then? Probably not, because I never thought I’d contract HPV, considered the number of sexual partners I’d had could be counted on one hand, and the hand of a shop instructor missing a few fingers at that.

Is it something I want my daughters to have at 11 years old? No way, or at least not until it has been thoroughly studied, which it may be by then. If not, I’ll rely on the old-fashioned method of keeping them safe: actually talking with them about sex and protecting themselves, and working to keep an open dialogue so they feel comfortable coming to me with questions.

There’s a ton of facts out there about Gardasil, HPV, and cervical cancer, far more than I have time to link to here with a toddler begging me for a banana. Luckily, Julie summed it up very well, so I’ll send you over to read what she had to say.



Grade Inflation: That’s A Fourth Grade Question?

Did anyone else watch Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? last night? I could say pure inertia made me watch it because it was on after American Idol (my guilty pleasure), but I’d be lying. My curiosity for a game show that sounds so simple – yet isn’t – forced me to watch. I generally rate my appreciation for game shows based on if I think I could do well on the show. Deal or No Deal? I could easily do that show. Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? I could do that, too, as long as Meredith let me ask her if she drinks around her kids. Jeopardy? OK, I’m not as good at that show, but I do feel proud when I can finish out an entire category.

My first reaction was one of smug superiority: with the questions they gave, I could clean up in this game. The first contestant couldn’t answer a single question without help! I found myself chanting the answers at the screen while he floundered for each question. The area of a triangle: 1/2 base times height…1/2 base times height…1/2 base times height! The second contestant was doing a little better, but still took a lot of time trying to find the right answers. The ship the pilgrims sailed on: the Mayflower! How hard is that?

OK, so the questions were easy for me. Yes, I’m a nerd who clearly paid attention in school, and has a ridiculous memory for useless information. And I’m not afraid to say I know the answers, which is probably why no one liked me in school. However, it was only the first episode, so I’m sure they will get to (many) questions I don’t know.

But here’s what I don’t get: these questions are supposed to match what the average fifth grader knows. I don’t know what freaky, gifted advanced-placement kids they hired for this show, but I doubt that the average fifth grader can tell you who was the first president to be impeached. (Andrew Johnson, by the way.) And the question about the area of a triangle seemed above an elementary school level. Are fifth graders really learning Geometry now? We didn’t cover that in school until eighth grade, and that was still ahead of many because I was in the accelerated math program.

I will watch the show again tonight. Partially because it once again follows Idol, and partially to see if the questions get any harder. I simply can’t believe that those questions are common knowledge for a fifth grade student. I also wonder what the qualifications are to be on the show? Do you think they let elementary school teachers play?



The Era of Bad Bangs

Kristen has thrown down the gauntlet, challenging others to come forth with visual proof of their bad bangs. Thankfully, I gave up bangs in favor of layers years ago (at least, I consider them layers and I’m sticking with my story), but her timing for this photo project couldn’t be better.

Just a few weeks ago, my mom brought me a photo album of pictures from high school. After reading Kristen’s post, I took a short walk down memory lane, and quickly ran screaming from the mountain of permed hair and hairspray that assaulted me.

I present High School: The Era of Bad Bangs

Pre-9th grade: The comb-over bangs (please excuse the Brooke Shields power eyebrows – I had yet to discover tweezers)

9th grade – the overgrown jungle of bangs cascading down half my face

10th grade – trying to grow them out, going for the comb-over method again (and check out the Hypercolor tee!)

11th grade – so much for growing them out – now they’re wispy and stuck together thanks to too much Aquanet

And finally 12th grade…

Proof that no one escaped the early 90’s without bad hair (my bad poodle hair with thick bangs is on the left, second row from the bottom)

After looking at all of that hair cut carnage, suddenly my childhood, late 70’s feathered cut doesn’t look so bad after all. Look at those lovely swept-aside bangs!



Names That Didn’t Make The Cut

As many of you know, Cordelia’s name came from Shakespeare – King Lear, to be exact. We’re considering going with another Shakespeare name for baby #2, although looking back through the plays, there are some names that probably won’t make the short list.

Unfortunate Shakespeare names for girls:

Ophelia (Hamlet) – Beautiful name. And I’d put it on my short list in an instant. But let’s be honest: mommy already suffers from a mental disorder (depression), and we really don’t need to encourage it in the kids.

Juliet (Romeo & Juliet) – Again, not a good role model here.

Desdemona (Othello) – She was innocent, but let’s not pick a name with domestic violence attached to it.

Volumnia (Coriolanus) – We’d just be encouraging fat jokes with this one.

Regan (King Lear) – Sorry, I lived through that president. Try again.

Goneril (King Lear) – I have a strict policy on no names that sound like STDs.

Violenta (All’s Well That Ends Well) – That name is just asking for a girl with a chip on her shoulder.

Hymen (As You Like It) – Forget the policy on STDs – no names that sound like anything dealing with reproductive organs.

Mopsa (The Winter’s Tale) – This is an especially bad name if she inherits the same mop of hair that Cordy has.

Dorcas (The Winter’s Tale) – No explanation needed, I think.

Maybe we should branch out to the works of Marlowe or Jonson?



I’m Not Sorry My Child’s Presence Bothers You

I know there are people in the world who are simply not interested in children and don’t like being around them. I can understand – kids can be a real handful and honestly, pretty annoying at times. But there are times when I am amazed that people can be so anti-child, especially with nothing provoking the response.

Today we were out at the mall, and decided to stop for lunch. We got our table, and Cordy was, at that moment, not interested in sitting down to eat. She cried for a couple of minutes, until we could settle in and find something to distract her. A banana did the trick, followed by crayons and paper to draw on. There was only one other occupied table in our area – a college-aged woman and an older woman. At one point while Cordy was crying, I made eye contact with the younger woman, who gave me a smile of understanding.

Only a few minutes later, all was happy and peaceful at our table. Cordy had a cup of milk to drink, and was spending her time coloring while Aaron and I chatted.

Five minutes later, the hostess comes by with an older couple, and tries to seat them at the table across from us. The woman quickly stops her and says, “No, we’d like somewhere more…quiet.” During that pause before the word “quiet” she turned around and glared at Cordy. The look could best be described as somewhere between I smell something bad and seething repulsion. The hostess offered to turn down the music in the restaurant before she understood the woman’s meaning and lead them to another section.

Aaron and I looked at each other and laughed. At the moment they came by, Cordy could have been the poster child for toddlers in public. She was quietly involved in coloring neatly on her paper, had her sippy cup of milk nearby without a drop spilling out of it, and the floor beneath her held no missing crayons, crumbs or other items from the tabletop. Not a sound was coming from her. I can only guess that this woman assumed that all children are loud and obnoxious, and fully expected Cordy to change into a screaming, food-throwing monster as soon as they sat down across from us.

(Or maybe she reads my blog and knows the tantrums Cordy is capable of? Nah, she didn’t look like the mommyblog-reading type.)

Did I point out that this is a family restaurant? As in, there is a large emphasis placed on children being there, with interesting knick-knacks on the walls, and an awesome kids menu coloring book. If the woman didn’t want to be around children, this was not the place to eat.

While we ate, several other families were seated, many with children. As we left, we looked around at the restaurant full of children and wondered where they managed to seat that couple that didn’t have kids around? We guessed they were next to the kitchen.

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Have you been over to my reviews blog lately? I have a new review posted about the book, Good Kids Bad Habits. If you’re looking for ways to get your kids to eat better, get more exercise, or take better care of themselves, you should check it out!

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