Even the "Relatively Healthy" Have Problems Getting Health Insurance

Now that Aaron has this (ever-so-temporary) contract job, we thought it might be nice to have some health insurance again for the two of us. I researched all of the private insurance plans out there, mostly disgusted with 1. how expensive they were and 2. how little they covered. I finally chose one that seemed to be a good balance of cost vs. coverage.

When I first spoke with a customer service rep, I expressed concern that they would try to stick us with a bunch of riders to prevent coverage for anything useful. She assured me that as long as Aaron and I were relatively healthy people, there probably would be few changes from our medical review.

Apparently we differ in our definition of “relatively healthy”.

I provided a very thorough medical history for both of us, leaving out nothing. Every detail was included, from lab values to drug lists. I considered us relatively healthy. I can’t remember the last time Aaron went to the doctor for something other than an annual physical. I’ve had some minor problems (moles removed, sinus surgery, etc.), and we’ve both had minor issues with depression.

They insisted on bloodwork for Aaron because it had been over a year since his last physical. A nice tech came out to our house to do the bloodwork, remaining vague on if we will ever see the numbers. After waiting two weeks to find out the state of our health insurance (while they were still taking money from our bank account, of course), we finally received the offical certificate.

Included with the certificate were several riders. We were both denied any mental health coverage, including medications. (Note to others: if your doctor offers you antidepressants for anything, give serious thought to taking them. If you’re ever forced to pay for private insurance, you might be denied or limited based on this one decision.) Anything dealing with previous conditions wouldn’t be covered for 6 months. I would have to pay a $500 deductible for any prescription medications instead of the standard $150. And Aaron was completely denied any prescription drug benefits.

That last one puzzled me, so I called for clarification. “Well, they probably denied him because he is taking a very expensive medication.”

“But he’s not taking anything at the moment.”

“Oh, well, he must have taken expensive medications in the past then.”

“Nope. He’s taken one prescription medication, and it’s the one I’m currently on, and I wasn’t denied.”

“Well, then, there must be some other reason that they determined he was a poor financial risk for prescription medications.”

“I’m confused. He doesn’t take any medications, and prefers to not take them unless necessary. My history, on the other hand, shows I’m a walking formulary of drugs, yet I’m still being offered benefits.”

She paused and I could hear the clicking of computer keys. “It’s possible he was denied prescription benefits based on his bloodwork.”

I explained that I needed to know the results of that test, and was promptly told no. I applied a little more pressure, and convinced her to at least tell me what values were outside of normal. But she would not give me the actual numbers, so really, the information was pretty useless. I mean, one point over normal is nothing but would still result in a high reading, but way over the normal values would be more serious.

I was told that I could submit $25 and a written request to a mailing address and might get a copy of the results. Apparently since they paid for the test, the insurance company isn’t required to release the results to us. Screwed up, isn’t it? I’m hoping we can get the results to determine if there’s anything we should be concerned about.

(Which, if he does have a problem, how jacked is our insurance system that they would rather treat more serious (or life-threatening) complications of a condition via hospitalization rather than pay for the medication to keep it from becoming serious?)

We decided after all of the limitations, we’d be paying $300 a month for practically nothing. I canceled the policy and will instead put that same amount of money into a savings account each month. Contrary to the insurance company’s belief, we’re both relatively healthy and will likely not need much in the next 6 months. (Knocking on wood furiously…) At that point I’ll graduate and will hopefully find a job with full benefits again. (Wait – need more wood to knock on now…)

If we do need anything, there are Minute Clinics and the like that charge a small amount to get minor illnesses taken care of. Our doctors will also accept a smaller cash payment to be seen.

I never thought buying private health insurance would be so difficult. Makes nationalized health care look dreamy. (I’m looking at you, Canada.) Here’s hoping the next administration can figure out a solution – or at least the beginning of a solution – to our screwed up system.



The People Who Make Post-It Notes Will Soon Love Me

I’d guess that I’m looking forward to 2009 more than the average person. With all of the bad we’ve had this year, I’m planning to consider that big ball in Times Square on Dec. 31 my executioner’s axe, cutting off all of the frustration, the anger, the worry and the heartbreak of 2008 and leaving it behind as we embrace the new year.

Which means I’d better start working on a plan for 2009.

I’m a lousy planner, I’ll admit. Something inside of me wants desperately to be organized – always aware of everything coming up and never found scraping things together at the last minute. But no matter how much I want to be that way, I eventually go back to being the girl who flies by the seat of her (worn thrice because she forgot to do laundry) pants.

One benefit of nursing school is that it forces me to organize. We are taught to prioritize and organize our day so the insurmountable mountain of tasks is whittled down to an acceptable level without the need to stay late. Prioritizing is probably the one skill out of all of the organization skills that I’ve taken a liking to.

It’s far too easy for me to hop from one project to whatever crosses my mind next, never stopping to think about if that new task is really important enough to override other items on my to-do list. That task is soon followed by another mental burst to go do something else, often leaving task #2 unfinished. (ADD much? My doctor even agrees with me now.)

2009 will be my year of the priority list. I’ve made every attempt to not turn into my mom and aunts with their neurotic ability to make list after list for everything from groceries to gift lists to who to call. But I have to admit – lists are helpful. Less helpful, though, is a jumbled to-do list that ranks throw away the Christmas lights that don’t work higher than buy cat food so your poor pets don’t walk out on you and charge you with neglect only because I thought of it first while writing.

Hopefully keeping prioritized (maybe color coded? Hmmm…might need to consider that idea) lists will help me stay on track. And we all know I need it. Like most moms, I have a lot of different hats to wear, and each has its own set of responsibilities. I’m responsible for paying the bills, some housework, Cordy’s school notices and permission slips, my schoolwork and clinical time, doctor appts. for both kids, setting up therapy appts. for Cordy, any type of appointments for me, grocery shopping, three blogs, three cats, two kids and a partridge in a pear tree. OK, the last one isn’t true. But I do have to keep the birdfeeder filled with birdseed.

(Let’s not even begin to count things I’d like to do, such as paint some of the rooms in our house and hang shit on the walls so I won’t feel like I’m still living in my old college apartment.)

Who knows? Maybe tackling tasks in an organized manner will give me a little more time in my life? I could think of a lot of uses for a little more spare time.

I could probably make a list of all of those free time ideas, too.

This post is part of the last PBN blog blast of the year, sponsored by Big Tent. Here’s hoping we all have a more organized 2009.



Haiku Friday: Smile!

Haiku Friday
We need a Christmas
card picture, but getting both
kids to smile is hard.

This one is cute but
too bad the cat knocked the lamp
onto Mira’s head


Another try: one
isn’t smiling and one is
looking away…sigh


Let’s try again. One
still looking away, one with
mouth full of cookie


C’mon girls, smile!
Wait! Stop choking your sister
Cordy! No headlocks!

(Ya gotta click on this one to see Mira’s expression up close.)

The only time they
sit together is when they
are eating cookies

So every attempt
shows two mouths covered in fine
layers of brown crumbs

I give up. I’ll have
to rely on Picnik to
create a good pic.

I always thought it was difficult to get a good picture of Cordy for our holiday cards each year. Turns out, having two kids isn’t twice as hard – it’s about 649 times as hard. Like trying to wrangle dinosaurs through your great-grandmother’s miniature glass animal collection.

And for some reason, the only time I can get these two to sit next to each other is if there are cookies involved. If I should wipe their mouths off, the moment is gone and they won’t even stay in the same part of the room. Thank goodness for photo editing.

To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your main blog URL). DON’T sign unless you have a haiku this week. If you need help with this, please let me know.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button at the top.

REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will delete any links without haiku!



What Would You Do If $100 Fell Into Your Lap?

When I sorted through the mail this afternoon, I was struck by a small card addressed to me. Ah, the first Christmas card of the season! I thought. I looked it over, not finding a return address. Strange.

The real surprise came when I opened the envelope. (Actually, it had been opened already on the side – not sure if some postal worker carefully ripped it open or our moist weather split the seam. I’m guessing the latter.) Inside was a simple holiday wishes card, and 5 $20 bills. Wait, what? $100! I quickly scanned the inside of the card to see who sent this, but there was no name.

I was completely confused for a moment. Who sent us a card and forgot to sign it? It was then that Aaron pointed out that it was only addressed to me and it was from Chattanooga, TN. It was most likely not from any family.

An anonymous gift of $100. Wow.

So, in the very likely case that my secret Santa reads this blog, I’d like to say thank you. Your gift was amazing and generous and worthy of the tears that came to my eyes.

And with practically no hesitation, I decided I’m planning to use part of the money to pass on your random act of kindness to others. 2008 has quite possibly been the suckiest year I’ve ever had, but I think we can agree this has been a disastrous year for many. Yet we’ve kept our house thus far, and while we still have no long-term employment or health insurance (except for the kids, thanks to SCHIP), Aaron has a contract job that is providing a decent income for last month and this month, and we have great family and friends who are incredibly supportive. Looking at all of that, we’re wealthy compared to many.

I’m planning to invest at least half of this gift into formula and diapers for my local YWCA. They are one of the few family shelters in Columbus, where entire families can remain together while they try to get back on their feet. I first learned about their services last month while in my nursing school clinical. At the hospital I cared for a woman who told me she was living at the YWCA shelter with her husband and kids. I asked a few questions and found out they both had good full time jobs, but then both were laid off, and soon after their house was foreclosed on when they couldn’t find new jobs. It spiraled down until they found themselves at a shelter so they weren’t sleeping in their car.

In different circumstances, my family could be that family. The YWCA provides so many services for these families with nowhere else to go, including childcare, in-house tutors and after-school programs for older kids, meals, and employment assistance. Right now on their website, they are asking for diapers and other baby supplies, as their current demand is outpacing their supply. They received 2000 diapers last month, but needed over 2500.

I also want to help them because of an article I read recently about mothers watering down formula to make it last longer, often leading to infant malnutrition and life-threatening conditions as a result. Many moms don’t realize that cutting formula with more water is dangerous. But due to the economic conditions, formula is hard to buy, hard to keep in stock at food banks, and is now such a prized possession that it’s being stolen in record numbers. I can’t imagine stealing anything, but were I desperate and had an infant who needed food, I would probably steal formula to make sure she could eat.

While my girls have lots of “wants” (Cordy’s change daily, it seems), I know their needs are met. Using a large portion of this gifted money to help other children’s needs seems like the right thing to do. I hope you’re OK with that, anonymous gifter. I promise I’ll use a little bit of it for something for myself, and the girls will each get a small gift, too. But I’d like to use most of it to continue the spirit of giving. I’ve been wishing I could do more to help those who are so desperate for the basic necessities, and your gift is helping make that possible for me.

Thanks again. I’m genuinely touched by this random act of kindness and humbled that someone thought I deserved this. Whoever you are, you rock.

(And yes, I’ll admit I’m really curious who this is from, mostly because I’m wondering who has my address?)

(And to everyone else – have you practiced a random act of kindness lately?)

(One more parentheses and I’m done, I swear: visit Her Bad Mother to see how she’s giving back to those more needy, including offering up an iPod to her readers. Plus there’s a great Charlie Brown clip.)



How A Bendy Straw Nearly Made Me Cry

Sometimes in parenting, it’s the small victories that mean the most. Today we had one of those moments:


That’s Cordy, drinking with a straw. For the first time ever.

It was three years ago (she was 15 months) that we were struggling with weaning her off of a bottle while she stubbornly refused to try a sippy cup. I eventually convinced her that she could obtain liquid from a sippy cup, but her condition was that I had to hold it for her.

She held it on her own at 19 months.

For over a year now Operation: Remove Sippy Cup has been in effect, and until today it was an utter failure. She refused to drink anything unless it was in a sippy cup, and it had to be in only one brand of sippy cup, too. A brand which, incidentally, they changed the design for last year, making it impossible to buy any new cups. And she considers the redesign a different type of cup.

I don’t know if you are aware of the life span of a sippy cup, but it doesn’t last forever. Eventually it becomes worn and small bits of black mold try to form in the moist crevices after it’s 2-3 years old. Cordy’s small collection of sippy cups have been washed thousands of times, and bleached more than a few to remove any beginnings of mold. We’ve had to declare three of them complete losses when they were left behind a sofa or in the car for more than a few days and no amount of bleach would remove the mold that started growing. Which leaves us with only 5 sippy cups, and no hope of reinforcements.

So you can see why we’ve been urging her to leave the sippy behind and try something else. At school they’ve convinced her to drink from an open cup, but it has to be the size of a Dixie cup and it can only be at school. Straws have never been an option.

(I should mention at this point that Mira has been drinking from a straw since 9 months old. The resentment of having a younger sib show her up must take a few more years to develop.)

Cordy’s autism plays a small part in this. I know many kids are stubborn – this is a problem that any parent could have. But Cordy has a preternatural fear of change. The slightest shift to her schedule or the objects in her life can ruin any tranquility in our house. We have to gently push her towards change, ever so slightly, trying to maintain the balance between drawing her out beyond her fears and losing her for a time as she retreats inside her own mind.

So how did we manage this feat? The promise of ice cream. Bribes work on any kid. OK, well, bribes never worked for this before now. Hey, I don’t care how it worked.

Of course, tomorrow she may refuse to look at a straw. We’ll see. But for now I’m thrilled.

Maybe potty training will come next?

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