Another Evaluation Complete, This Time With Less Head Banging

When last we left our stressed-out mommy and her strong-willed, curly-headed child, they were getting ready for an evaluation to determine if spectrum disorders were still on the table for said strong-willed, curly-headed child.

Saturday’s evaluation went well, or at least way, WAY, better than the last time someone tried to evaluate Cordy. We arrived at the small office, and after a quick trip to the potty (over a month without an accident during the day – WOO-HOO!), the evaluator asked if Cordy wanted to pick out a toy to play with while she and I talked at the beginning. Cordy surveyed the dolls and books and shook her head no, but then another cabinet revealed a peg board, and she was immediately happy.

While Cordy took out the pegs and replaced them in order, I gave her history to the evaluator. (And because I hate typing out evaluator each time, let’s just call her Amy because, well, that’s her name.) After reviewing her history, Amy asked Cordy to join her at the table in the room. Cordy refused, and instead became fascinated with some wind chimes hanging in the window. Several different approaches were used to get her to sit at the table, but Cordy said she was too wiggly, too scared of the chair, too tired, and anything else she could think of.

We finally settled her on the couch next to me, and Amy pulled the table over to the couch. I had to take the peg board away from her to gain her attention. Amy started with various types of cognitive testing, and Cordy, when she focused, breezed right through them.

The test that amazed me was a pictogram test. Amy showed Cordy two symbols and asked her to repeat the names of each symbol: “girl” “the.” Next, she turned the page and showed her two more symbols, followed by another page where the symbols were arranged in a sentence. Amy then added two new symbols with each page turn, asking Cordy to read each new sentence without reviewing the old symbols.

She worked her way up to about 15-18 symbols, and Cordy could read most of the symbols without further prompting. The one she missed were consistent, meaning she probably wasn’t paying attention during the introduction for those symbols. Let me put it this way: she was doing better at remembering the symbols than I was. Essentially, she was reading a written language she had just been taught. I was stunned.

After the cognitive tests, Amy gave Cordy a break (with the peg board, of course) while she brought in some toys for a play evaluation. A year and a half ago, this was a disaster because Cordy refused to play with the toys they gave her. This time, before the plastic tubs of toys were opened Cordy spied an old 1980’s Fischer-Price cash register (remember those?) on the shelf in the room and asked to play with it. Amy shrugged her shoulders and said it was fine to play with the cash register.

Cordy immediately went to work figuring out how to put the plastic coins in the slots and push the buttons. Amy watched her for a few minutes, stepping in to help when Cordy asked for help, but otherwise observing how she played with the toy. Eventually, Amy picked up a pencil and asked if she could buy it. Cordy ignored her at first, getting frustrated with a coin stuck in one of the slots.

Amy asked again, this time giving more prompts for social play. Cordy eventually responded, telling her the pencil was “One hundred.” Amy picked up a coin and gave it to Cordy, and she put it in the register. Each time Amy had to initiate the social play and Cordy would follow along, often getting very excited about the game. But without her prompting, Cordy would go back to her own private exploration of the cash register. “Had I not stepped in, would she have continued playing like that?” Amy asked me.

“Most likely.”

“That’s what I thought.”

After an hour and a half, Cordy’s evaluation was over, without any tears, thrashing or head banging. We often had to ask Cordy to sit up on the couch, or pay attention to what was on the table, or stop bouncing, but there were no meltdowns. I can’t even describe my relief.

Amy told me that the questionnaires I filled out would need to be scored along with her evaluation forms, and said I should expect to hear back from her in 3-4 weeks for a meeting to discuss the results.

3-4 weeks sounded like eternity to me, so I asked her if she could give me her initial impressions of Cordy’s behavior. Amy replied that she was certain Cordy would still be considered on the spectrum, and would likely keep the diagnosis given by the school of PDD-NOS. However, she said that based on what she saw, she would probably have Cordy evaluated for Asperger’s when she’s a little older. Having it confirmed that Cordy’s cognitive skills are excellent was good to hear, and Amy was also impressed with her verbal abilities.

Our session ended with Amy telling me that based on Cordy’s history and records, it’s obvious to her that we (her parents and her teachers) have put a lot of effort into helping her, and it shows. She said we were right to get her evaluated and into therapy when we did. Without early intervention, she might not have the skills she has now, and it’s likely her future has been forever changed thanks to that intervention.

Deep exhale now. Knowing that my Amazon warrior princess made it through the evaluation without causing a scene left me so proud of her. I could tell she was starting to burn out by the end of the meeting. More fidgeting, eye contact disappeared, hopping in place, some hand flapping, etc. We left before she completely lost her focus, managing to say goodbye to Amy, and even looking her in the eye briefly after Amy asked Cordy to look at her and say bye again. We left with no one glad to see her go. No bruises, no tear-stained face, no carrying her out.

Now we wait for the official meeting. If/when a diagnosis is given, we’ll be given even more access to services in Columbus. That’s great news for us.

And my little girl. My firstborn. My Cordelia. She frustrates the hell out of me so often, to the point where I want to yell Would you just act normal for once! But in her ginormous blue eyes, I can see her determination and her struggle to understand her world. I can’t fault her for her incessant questioning, her confused tears or her overwhelmed screeches. She wants to be a good girl, and she wants to learn all she can. The extra hurdles she has to jump won’t take her down.

Autism or no autism, she’s an awesome kid, and she’s only going to get better.

We celebrated by going to the zoo the next day, where you can see Cordy was nearly mauled by a giant koala.


Haiku Friday: Nervous

One more day until
Cordy goes for another
evaluation

The school did it first
but now we are seeking a
medical response

Does Cordelia have
autism? Doctors will have
their say Saturday

If yes, more doors will
open for treatment and more
therapies also.

But I know this will
be so hard on her – testing
really bothers her

They will push her to
her limits, and I will do
my best not to cry

We’ve been through these evaluations before, but since they were performed by the school system, they don’t “count” in the long term. I placed her on a waiting list for a medical evaluation over 6 months ago, but due to the high demand for these evaluations now (scary, isn’t it?), there was still no call. Thankfully, her case worker reminded me that they work with providers other than the big hospitals, and worked her magic to get an appointment within a month.

While I know that we’ve done this before, I can’t help but remember that horrible first evaluation, when Cordy thumped her head on the floor over and over, shrieked and screamed so loud that she scared the nurse, and clawed at the door in an attempt to escape. I don’t expect a repeat of that behavior, but she will likely be uncomfortable and may lash out. I hope she’ll show them only as much as she needs to show to make up their minds, without getting too upset or manic.


To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your main blog URL). DON’T sign unless you have a haiku this week. If you need help with this, please let me know.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button at the top.

REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will delete any links without haiku!



My Car Is Feeling Drained

While one of our cars is reaching geriatric status, as far as cars go, the other is still a spring chicken. Purchased after the untimely death of our Plymouth – thank you Valvoline instant oil change for forgetting to replace a cap so all the oil drained out – our Hyundai Tucson came to us as nearly new.

Being nearly new, we’ve had few problems with it, and the few problems we’ve had were due to the dealer being cheap. The tires were swapped at the last minute and replaced with nearly bald tires, even though the car had less than 20K miles on it. And the battery was likely an old battery.

So when the battery died in December, we gave a long distance middle finger to the dealer yet again and settled on the fact that we had an old battery. Not wanting to spend a lot of money, we took the car to Wal-Mart for a shiny new battery, and soon all was well again.

Except in February, when the car wouldn’t start. At this point, we were convinced there was something wrong with the car, not the battery. This was a brand new battery! Maybe it was the alternator? We called AAA again, and the gentleman who assisted us ran a few tests and told us the battery wouldn’t hold a charge. He assured us it was a defective battery, and suggested returning to Wal-Mart and asking them for a replacement.

We took it back for a new battery, selecting a different store in the off-chance it was a bad batch of batteries. Thankfully, they replaced it with little argument. Shiny new battery, happy car – the end, right?

Nope. On Friday, the car was dead. Again.

At this point, I was convinced there was something wrong with the car. Something was drawing a charge from the battery, even when the car was off, causing it to drain the battery. I couldn’t even think of the costs involved in diagnosing and fixing an electrical problem in the car. We’re still mostly unemployed, and a costly car repair is not in the budget.

Another call was placed to AAA this morning for a jump start. When the technician came out, he listened to our battery history and ran a few tests on the car. Turns out, the battery again wouldn’t hold a charge. When we mentioned how unlikely it was for us to have two defective batteries, he printed out a test strip, showing that there were no electronic components drawing a charge from the battery while the car was off. “Take that to Wal-Mart and demand your money back,” he told us, “You’ve got a bad battery.”

Instead of replacing the battery at Wal-Mart again, we chose to buy a battery from AAA. It carries a warranty that guarantees they’ll service the battery for free if there are any problems in the next three years. And any service calls for the battery will not count against our yearly number of free service calls. Hooray!

Now we have to return the Wal-Mart battery, and I expect a full refund. I hope they’ll put a little more effort into making sure they have trustworthy batteries. We’re lucky that both times the car battery died, the car was at home instead of out somewhere inconvenient with two children in the backseat. I certainly won’t be buying a battery from them again – one defective battery is bad luck, but two is a problem.

Wal-Mart? You might want to fix that.

(And while I’m on a roll with ranting, I’ll add: Old Navy? WTF is up with your jeans? Your Sweetheart “Classic rise” is supposed to fall just below the waist, and last I checked, my waist is not just above my pubic bone. I like my jeans to be at least as high up as my underwear.)



This Is What Happens When You Watch Too Much Bollywood While Pregnant

Give Mira a sticker, and you’ve got a 90% chance of it ending up in the same place every single time:



What is it about the middle of her forehead that screams I need some decoration here! ?

I think she’ll be requesting a package of bindi jewelry for her birthday next month.

PS – Yes, she has a permanent case of bedhead.

PPS – No, it cannot be tamed with any amount of styling product.

PPPS – Yes, I tried everything. Embrace the tousled look.



Haiku Friday: Weed or Flower?

Haiku Friday
My backyard is a
sea of yellow – beautiful
yet unwanted buds

Who decided that
dandelions are nothing
more than evil weeds?

If it wasn’t for the fact that my entire neighborhood believes that dandelions should be eradicated from the planet, I’d be able to enjoy the golden blanket across my backyard. Actually, I still think they’re pretty, and while I’ve eradicated them in the front yard, I don’t want to use harsh chemicals in the areas where my kids play.

By the way – thanks for all the garlic suggestions last week! I can’t wait to try out some of your ideas!

Also, I’m walking in the March for Babies here in Columbus this weekend – if you haven’t donated to the March of Dimes yet, please consider helping me reach my goal in the walk! I’m walking not only in honor and memory of those touched by prematurity in my life, but I’m also walking in memory of Maddie. I’ll have purple balloons at the walk, keeping them with me as a reminder and then setting them free at the end.

To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your main blog URL). DON’T sign unless you have a haiku this week. If you need help with this, please let me know.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button at the top.

REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will delete any links without haiku!

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