Queen of Clutter

A certain blogger (ahem, Mrs. Fortune) laid claim to the title of the worst housekeeper since Oscar Madison. She provided proof to back up her claim, although she failed to show the bedroom.

While I adore Mrs. Fortune and would never do anything to hurt our bloggy friendship, I would like to challenge her on this topic. I fully believe I am the worst housekeeper ever. Not only do I have pictures to prove it, I have references as well. My mother would gladly affirm to my title as the Queen of Clutter, and my grandmother and aunts would concur.

And now, the proof. First is the room known as my room. It’s a guest room as well as my sewing/craft room.


OK, you could argue that since it is a craft room, a certain amount of clutter is allowed. The bags and boxes are full of fabric that will someday be turned into little dresses. The tote under the bed contains Cordy’s outgrown clothing I want to put on e-Bay. And this is a room that is upstairs, out of the line of sight of the casual visitor.

But there’s more:


This is my computer desk. It looks particularly bad right now because I am a wee bit (like, say, 3 months) behind in balancing the checkbook. I used to do that every week, entering every receipt into Microsoft Money, then filing the receipts away neatly. Well, having a baby does change everything, they say.

But again you could argue that it’s a desk space – a work area – and therefore can easily become cluttered. Plus, it’s an armoire that can be closed. (or so the theory goes) OK, fine. Then here is my ultimate evidence:


This is the console table visitors see upon first entering our house. We bought it so that we could organize all the crap we tend to drop at the door. Ha. Now we have buried it beneath the crap it was purchased to conquer. Look – the lamp even appears to be crying out for help, drowning in the baskets, books, and clutter.

I could show more pictures, but I think my point has been made. And like Mrs. Fortune, I will refrain from showing my bedroom, because the site of that could eliminate my readership entirely.

While I am embarrassed at the clutter I have, I don’t even know where to begin in cleaning it up. Every few weeks, I’ll sit down and begin in a corner, but soon give up to the enormous task facing me. One day I’ll get it under control.

Is there anyone else brave enough to show off their clutter? Bad housewives of the world, unite!

(Oh, and if I suddenly disappear from here, it’s because Martha Stewart found me, ball-gagged me and is holding me hostage until I come up with a game plan to clean this place up, along with painting the walls and making origami lanterns and my own raspberry jam to serve at a beautifully decorated 4th of July party.)

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Comments

  1. OK, I officially love you more than I did before.

    Because I AM ONE TOO.

    And it’s bad. Really bad, because Husband is worse.

    And I don’t know if I have the chutzpah to be all out there with the photos. We’re not *dirty*, just clutter freaks. And, Husband is addicted to renovation. And, Baby. All adds up to Martha Stewart’s Worst Nightmare.

  2. I’m up for the challenge – I’ll let you know when I post!

  3. There are many more important things to do than housekeeping. This is just proof you have your priorities in order!

  4. I think it is very telling that I looked at your pics and thought – hey that ain’t bad at all. My house is so cluttered I have to put a life preserver on my two year old to keep him afloat.

    If you think you’re bad, than I am an all out domestic disaster. Well, off to see if I can find the cat.

    Sara
    babyowls.blogspot.com

  5. Raspberry Jam is easy. Try the freezer jam raspberry on the insert found in the box of Sure-Jell. It really is easy.

    Cleaning? Cleaning is really, really hard. I don’t do that.

  6. Well unfortunately we don’t live close to each other because I would be more than willing to help you out. I loved your photos and wanted to jump right in. Please don’t feel bad or embarrassed. It can be extremely overwhelming when facing a mountain of clutter and hard to know where even to start. Life’s like that…it can just get past us sometimes. Try to break it down into smaller jobs and tackling one area at a time. I’ll keep checking back for progress reports. Good luck.

  7. Mommy off the Record says

    Wow that console table is something! LOL

    Our house “looks” pretty neat but it’s really a sham cuz I shove all our junk into our garage, including a rug that my cat peed on 4 months ago. Ewww.

  8. The console is impressive, but the rest? Pssh. That’s nothing. I can’t even take a picture of my spare bedroom because the camera would explode from the sheer magnitude of clutter one small click of the shutter would have to take in. And my bedroom is this close to becoming a SuperFund site. And yet here I sit, blogging.

    I’ve got priorities.

  9. hehe I am a tad neurotic so most clutter is contained to some degree. Lately my desk has gotten bad, and I have a hundred projects on the go…grrr I need a declutter day!

  10. Anonymous says

    I can’t show good photos, well, because my clutter is organized…but my floors need sweeping and mopping, both of my bathrooms are torn apart for remodeling and painting and my bedroom is in need of dusting…I am organized with the things you mention but the real dirt is in the floors…you wouldn’t really want me to show you that!

    Jerri Ann
    [email protected]
    http://www.acracknlife.squarespace.com

  11. Well I am in the middle of a move and our home is a disaster so I feel like I would be cheating. LOL! I’m glad you realize that you have better things to do than just clean! 🙂

  12. Like I told Mrs. F – looks lived-in and comfortable. You wouldn’t need to do a single thing to prepare for a visit from me. I’m only anal about my OWN house.

  13. Wow, you are certainly giving me a run for my money. I love that you posted these photos!!! I hope a lot of people follow suit because suddenly I’m feeling A LOT better about my house!!!

  14. oohh…I smell a theme post for all of your readers! Unfortunately, my parents were down this week, so I felt compelled to clean the visiting areas. I will have to take pics of the basement and our bedroom to put your mind at ease!

    I think real people don’t keep their houses perfect.

  15. lynsalyns says

    My bad housekeeping is already on the record! Sadly, since we are showing the house, I am no longer able to post pictures of the horror that is my bedroom. I usually have at least six laundry baskets filled with wash in various stages of clean and dirty. Now it is all stashed in closets.

    I hope no one looks in the closets …

  16. Your not alone! And dont be so hard on yourself, it wasnt that bad.

    I had to giggle, because your computer desk looks like mine.

  17. Okay, if I do this, promise you won’t laugh or point?

    I’ll post it tomorrow!

  18. Christina, I invite you to meet my friend, Flylady! http://www.flylady.net I have a long ways to go before I get things under control, but this site totally rocks. If you sign up for the e-mails you get lots per day, but you can ignore most of them and start small. Just do a little at a time – a load or two of laundry every day until you have conquered “Mount Washmore,” and 15 minutes of decluttering per day and eventually you will get there. You start by simply shining your kitchen sink. And I’m telling you, it really works. More slowly for some than others, but really, if you take to heart that you don’t have to do it all at once, you can make good progress a little bit at a time! And you get a reminder in every e-mail that “you are not behind – jump in where you are.” That is very useful to me – I need to be reminded of that every day.

    I lovelovelove you for having a craft room. I sew too, of course, being a sister Rennie, but don’t have space for a craft room. But an entire half of one of our closets is full of my fabric, patterns, interfacing, ribbon, pins, you name it…

  19. You know, when children service’s workers come to investigate reports of abuse and neglect, one of the things they look for is an overly clean house. That let’s them know that the children aren’t allowed to be kids and the adults do nothing but clean – shows skewed values or something. So see, using objective, child-development expert criteria, you are parenting with absolutely the right priorities.

  20. I would be way to embarassed to show you just how badly I have you beat. LOL! Seriously. You’ll NEVER see my clutter. EVER. Let’s just keep it a secret like Monica’s closet on Friends. Remember that episode?

  21. I just shove everything in the closets!!! Hee hee…at least you have tried to organize your stuff…I see some nice wicker baskets there. They are great catch alls 🙂

  22. I refuse to allow the public to see my mess.

    Because I have serious nightmares about it. Just know that I keep my door locked at all time and people must give me 24 hours notice before arriving on my stoop.

    I’m still trying to wrestle with the guilt of not being able to do it all. Maybe there is a therapy group somewhere I can join…