A Mommy Story

Dear Westerville McDonald’s,

Due to the proximity of your establishment to my place of work, and due to the lack of other fast food establishments, I order food from you at least once a week far too frequently. While I am a big fan of your french fries and double cheeseburger, I am now on a quest to improve my health. And so I decided today that I would skip the greasy food that you do so well for one of your premium salads.

I’ve had these salads before. They’re good. The salad is filling while not being too high in fat and calories, especially with the grilled chicken instead of the crispy chicken. The portion size is good, even if the cost is a little high. However, today is became clear that your location clearly doesn’t have a lot of people requesting salads.

My first tip that something might be amiss was the sticker you forgot to remove from the salad container. This informed me that the salad MUST be used by 12:30pm 5/9/06. You were lucky, and came in just under the wire on that one: it was 12:25pm. Nothing like getting a salad that was 5 minutes away from expiring.

When I arrived back to the office, I then discovered you forgot to put in the croutons. An easy miss, I understand. But when faced with little more than dry chicken, lettuce, and salad dressing, those butter and garlic croutons are a carb-lover’s dream come true in a sea of leafy greens, protein and oil.

Then I carefully opened the top of the salad container, and was greeted with half a salad. The bowl was only half-full of lettuce. OK, I’m used to getting skimped on fries at McDonald’s, but now you’re skimping on LETTUCE? Seriously? In case you forgot, this damn salad costs four times more than my fries, and I want all the lettuce I’m supposed to have!

Which brings me to some important questions: why must I pay $5 in order to eat chicken and lettuce in a bowl, when a McChicken sandwich costs $1? Why must your healthy menu be so expensive, while people can eat all the crap they want from your dollar menu? Is the labor involved in cutting the chicken into strips really that expensive? What kind of Ginsu chef are you hiding amongst the immigrants in the kitchen? I shouldn’t be forced to make the decision to save money and eat cheap or splurge and eat healthy. Healthy vs. cheap is just not fair.

Perhaps next time I want a chicken salad, I will order a chicken sandwich with extra lettuce (which is free to add to sandwiches, so why are you skimping me in the salad?), cut the chicken up myself, mix with the lettuce from the sandwich, tear the bun up into crouton-sized pieces, and enjoy my $1 “premium” chicken salad.

Sincerely,

A woman who no longer wants to be fat, but wants her lettuce and croutons!