Yesterday was my day off. Last month on our anniversary, my dear husband gave me one of the best gifts ever: gift cards to get my hair cut, get a spa treatment, and get something to make me feel like my “old self” from Hot Topic.
So yesterday Aaron kept Cordy for the day. I got to sleep in, and then I went to the mall for my day off. Four hours later, my hair was styled, and my eyebrows waxed. I had a massage and a facial, too. I felt five years younger.
Oh yeah, I love my husband. I made the hairdresser jealous when I told her why the day was so special, and the lady who did my facial said she hopes her fiance will do that for her after they’re married. Aaron may not have known it, but I’ll bet he was glowing all day from everyone thinking so well of him.
And damn was that day off needed! Why you ask? What stress has entered my life that could warrant an entire day of pampering and rest? I’ll tell you:
Cordelia has not napped for the past week.
The week before, she resisted her naps but gave in most days. But the past seven days, any time she’s been put in her crib for a nap, she has sat there the entire time, playing with her blanket and talking to her feet.
No sleep. You can see the fatigue in her eyes, but her will is stronger. Near the end of the day, she sways back and forth as she walks, occasionally stumbling and falling over as if drunk. She’s tired, she’s grumpy, but she won’t give in.
The only time she gives in to sleep is when she’s in the car. While she’s never been good at napping in the car, she will now nod off for a few minutes – just long enough to keep from taking a proper nap.
She’s 18 months old. She dropped her second nap around 12 months, which is early but entirely in the “average” range. All of the “experts” say a toddler will continue with one nap at least until two years old, if not longer. Those filthy liars. It’s no wonder I cancelled my BabyCenter e-mail updates.
Truthfully, no one I know has a child who didn’t nap at this age. I’ve asked for advice, but our local friends and our relatives have never encountered this situation. She has to stay in her crib for a minimum of 45 min., even if she doesn’t sleep, so she is getting some down-time, but it’s obvious she needs the sleep.
This afternoon we went to an 80th birthday party for Aaron’s step-grandmother. She asked why Cordy was acting so cranky, and I told her it was because Cordy was trying to drop her nap. She looked at me, shocked, and said, “Well, you can’t let her do that.” I can’t let her do that? OK, short of drugging her, how can I keep her from it?
So now I turn to you, oh wise and knowing blogosphere. Has anyone encountered a child younger than two who has given up the last nap? Is there anything I can do? Will she go back to napping again, or is that golden time in the afternoon gone forever?
Sigh…of all of the developmental milestones for Cordy to be ahead of the curve on, why did it have to be napping?
I have to agree that while it seems impossible to force her to nap..you gotta, some how, some way, come up with a plan so that she is at least getting some down time. If you put her in the bed in a dark room….maybe? That would be the first thing I would try with mine. My children happen to love naps like their mother….weird, I know. That’s the other thing, even if you have to lay down with her and hold her captive until she falls asleep..I’ve done that before.
She really is way too young to give up napping all together. In my personal opinion and the one I spout about in my book on sleep….I say nap until they are at least 4..some kinds won’t, some parents don’t…but if you watch, you can probably pin nearly every disciplinary need on lack of sleep or lack of a good diet. I firmly believe that as a society we do not put enough emphasis on sleep. And our children will suffer the most for that!
Off my soapbox, sorry!
Jerri Ann
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http://www.acracknlife.squarespace.com
Both my kids have gone through no napping phases, and yet both are still napping today. (My oldest turned 3 about 6 weeks ago). I say, just keep putting her in the crib everyday at the same time, don’t make a big deal of it, but leave her in there for at least 45 minutes. If she is in there by herself happy, but not sleeping, leave her in there for longer–an hour and a half or so. Eventually, she’ll start sleeping again. I think the worst thing you can do at this point would be to give up altogether–like you said, she’s obviously tired. She’s just stubborn!
(At least, that’s been my experience. Both my kids are pretty decent sleepers, though, and have been for most of their lives.)
(Oh, also? Try not to get frustrated (ha!) For a while when Isaac was refusing to nap I would get SO UPSET. I think this just made it that much worse.)
Anyway–GOOD LUCK.
Oh, and I forgot! Awesome day at the spa for you! Way to go Aaron!
I also had a no napper. Zoe had her last day nap at around 18 months and hasn’t looked back. I used to cheat and about once a week go for a long drive at around what used to be nap time (cos she would then sleep in the car) when she got really cranky. Otherwise I just went with it…not much you can do. Two things we really can’t force them to do and I choose not to fight over either one – SLEEP and FOOD. Good luck!
I am not a wealth of information. Becca naps every afternoon unless we are out somewhere (I try to avoid that). She sleeps in her “big bed” and has music on the entire time. Around 15 months she did resist sleeping in her crib, but we had begun introducing her to the bed so we just switched over and it worked awesome! I dread the day she gives up naps…I so need that time
Awesome gift!! I am so glad you had the opportunity to relax and be pampered!
My husband gave up napping at one year old but my mother in law would still put him in his crib for quiet time. My two year old will go in non napping waves, where he will spend the entire time he would normailly nap playing with his blankets and taking to himself. I keep putting hism down at the same time every day and eventually he will crash and take his naps for a few weeks. Even when he decides to totally give up naps I will still be having quiet time because I totally need my nap.
Maddy and Ben both did that, and what I had to do was actually bring the kiddo into the bed with me and snuggle. Luckily there is a ceiling fan there, and if that is on, they would watch it and doze right off.
Also, try making the room darker. Maybe put blankets over the windows, that helps too 🙂
Yay for the hubby – sounds like a much needed day at the spa!
My friend’s daughter was “ahead of the napping curve” too. But you know your child and if you’ve tried everything (short of drugging her as you say) then you can’t force it. Here are some tricks that helped my friend…
– she put her to bed a little later or got her up a little earlier so she’d be more tired and want a nap during the day
– she created “quiet” time where she spent some time in her crib around nap time each day and as long as she was resting and quiet then it seemed to help recharge her batteries even with out sleep.
Good luck. But do what feels right.
What can I say? I’m still trying to get Ella to sleep on her own.
I wish you the best though!
First of all I shall just say I wish we lived closer to each other. Why? Because then I would make our husbands be friends so that maybe Aaron would rub off on him and I would get a day of indulgence!
But moving on…
I feel for you sooo much on the nap issue. I obviously don’t have any tips for you, seeing as how mine is much younger and you were just giving me sleeping through the night tips!
However, my sister does home day care and I know that all of the children she keeps (who are 4 and under) still take a nap in the afternoon. The ones who don’t actually sleep are put down with some books to look at and are told that they must be quiet during rest time. Now I know that that could be near impossible to keep an 18 month old quiet, but I just thought I would share that!
First of all, I’m leaving your blog open on my laptop all day. I’m hoping the Hubby will happen upon it and get some good ideas for Mother’s Day gifts “on his own”.
Maybe there’s something in the air, but Chicky Baby has been fighting the naps for the past few days as well. Therefore, I will be of no help to you but you can feel like someone else is fighting the good fight with you!
It goes in spurts here. One week naps are great…the next they don’t exist. Ride it out. It just might be better next week.
My 2nd daughter was the early-no-napper….even now at 4 my boys will occasioanlly nap, and every time they do I fall to my knees and thank God…
Feel for ya, darlin….glad you got a break at least! LOL
Can’t help you, ’cause we’re dealing with the 5-month curve right now. Liquor, obviously, is frowned upon. What I can say is that taking efforts to physically exhaust them seems to help…
But dude! Had a spa day! Worth many hours of sleep, that.
Still, I getcha. The no-sleep, constant stimulation days are HARD.
OK, you all rock! If I make it to BlogHer, I’ll buy a drink for all of you.
Thanks for the support and suggestions. Today nearly turned into another no-nap day, but apparently Cordy was willing to sleep for grandpa today. She took an hour and a half nap! (her naps are generally under an hour)
Hopefully last week was just an off-week, and she’ll go back to napping.
Oh, and her room has room-darkening blinds AND curtains. If I try to make it any darker I’m going to have to paint the window black. 🙂
OH MY GOD …. Emmie telepathically read this with me and she is now TALKING like MAD in her crib TWO HOURS after she is supposed to be napping and 40 minutes after I put her down. She is 15 months .. please God let this be an abberation.
Paul was always a poor napper (still is) , and it took hell to get him down. I don’t know what the ‘you can’t let her do that!’ comment is for, since I’ve never found a reliable way to force a child to sleep. Besides the car ride.