A Mommy Story

Today I was speaking with my brother-in-law’s girlfriend (BIL’sGF), and CNN was on in the background. We both stopped at one point when they were reporting about some horrible thing happening in the world. No, I don’t remember what it was, since after awhile all of those news stories just blur together. Why can’t they add a few more happy stories to the news? Ah well, that’s another post entirely.

Anyway, BIL’sGF then said, “I don’t know if I’d ever want to have children in a world like this.” This comment made me look at Cordelia and wonder if Aaron and I really thought about the world we’d be bringing our child into.

I know the state of the world pretty much sucks right now. Terrorism, wars, religious clashes, school shootings, rape, young girls being kidnapped and killed…the list goes on and on. Add to that the greater than average number of natural disasters over the past year, and it would make anyone wonder if someone or something really thinks humanity should just be wiped out entirely. How could I be so selfish as to create another life and introduce it to the cruel and evil world we have now?

But then, I don’t really think things are necessarily the worst they’ve ever been. There have been plenty of moments in history that could make the short list of People Behaving Badly. Some refer to the “good ol’ times” when children had respect for their elders, families were together more, people knew and talked with their neighbors, and kids walked uphill in the snow both ways to get to school and were happy for the bags tied around their feet for shoes. I think these people are still stuck believing the spin of the 50’s. It wasn’t all Happy Days, people – they just wanted you to think that.

I mean, there are plenty of problems with today’s world. Yes, kids need to learn to show a little more respect. But who is responsible for teaching them that? The village can do all they possibly can to raise a child with values and morals, but if the parents of that child aren’t teaching and reinforcing those values, it’ll be lost on the kid. I realize you could debate the “who’s responsible” argument until the end of time, but most people agree that the parents share at least part of the responsibility.

So why did we bring a child into this mad, mad world? Because we plan on teaching her those values and morals to make her a good person. We choose to take the roles of parents very seriously, and even though we don’t have total control over how she’ll turn out, we can do our best to make sure she’s one of the “good apples” in the bunch.

Personally, I commend many of the parents I’ve seen online and in person. Those parents who clearly see the task ahead of them, and choose to face it rather than hope that society will do most of it for them. For parents like these, I say that you did a good thing by bringing a child into this world. The more dedicated parents we have, the more good people will hopefully come from it, and then just maybe those children will grow into adults who will change the world for the better. Even if Cordelia doesn’t grow into the person we hope she’ll be, we have to cling to that hope and do our best to teach her right from wrong and to be an independent thinker. And when the day comes that she sets off into the world on her own, we’ll know it was all worth it.