On Thursday morning I took a flight to Atlanta for the Type-A Parent Conference. This was the first time I’ve attended Type-A, and I was so excited to attend. I had planned to write a post for today about my conference experience, sharing fun photos with friends and some of what I learned, but then something happened late on Friday afternoon that changed my plans for today.
When I left Columbus, I prepared everything as best I could to make it easy on Aaron for solo-parenting for a few days. I set out clothing for the kids for each day. I also arranged for my mom to come to get the kids off the bus on Friday so Aaron wouldn’t need to leave work early.
On Friday afternoon, I confirmed with my mom at 3:30pm via text that she would be at our house by 4:15 to get the kids, who usually were off the bus between 4:30-4:45. She was already in town, near our house, and would be there in plenty of time.
I went back to my day at Type-A, confident that everything was being handled. So when I got a text from my mom at 5:18pm, I thought it would be her telling me the kids were home, or asking if Cordy could play on the XBox or some other simple request. Instead, it was this:
“How late should the kids be? They aren’t here yet.”
Even with the bus issues we’ve had so far this year, the bus had never been later than 4:50pm. It was nearly half an hour past that. (Their “official” drop-off time is supposed to be 4:15pm.)
Realizing the time, I was a little worried but wondered if perhaps my mom had missed a call from Columbus City Schools Transportation. In the past, they’ve used robo-calls to let parents know when bad traffic was slowing buses, or the driver has called us if the bus had mechanical trouble. The drivers have emergency phone contacts for all kids they transport.
I called my mom and asked her to check the answering machine. No message. She told me she had already contacted Aaron and he was trying to contact Transportation to find out where our kids were. I asked her to text me as soon as they got home, expecting this was just a case of bad traffic or a sub driver and they’d be home any second.
But.
But the fears started in my head. Why weren’t they home yet? They did get on the bus, right? I decided I’d help in the effort, calling Transportation myself. The phone rang and rang and rang. No answer, no connection to the usual holding queue – just ring after ring for nearly ten minutes, until it abruptly cut off and disconnected.
Did they all go home before all kids were safely at their homes? I hadn’t received another text from my mom, so they still weren’t home and it was now approaching an hour later than the late time they are usually home.
I was really worried now. I called my mom again to see if they had shown up. Still nothing, and no word on where they could be. The panic was slowly rising as I did my best to force it down and focus on what I could do to find my girls.
What could I do? I was three states away. I felt utterly helpless and frightened. So I went into full-court press, reaching out for help on social media:
@ColsCitySchools My two daughters are still not home from school & bus was due over an hr ago. Transportation isn’t answering. Please help!
— Christina McMenemy (@mommystory) September 27, 2013
I also looked up the school district’s directory and called the main office for the district. Still no answer. I tried Transportation again, and again had no answer.
I was supposed to go out to dinner with a group at the conference. With the panic now firmly taking hold of me, I choked back tears and waved them to go on without me as I returned to my hotel room, clutching my cell phone tightly, eyes glued on my only link to the drama back home.
My mom called again, asking if I’d heard anything. It was now 6pm, two and a half hours since the school day ended. I told her I couldn’t get through to anyone. “I don’t like this at all,” my mom said. “Do you think we should call the police?”
“Yes,” I replied without hesitation, suddenly realizing it was the last option we had left. My kids were missing, no one from the district was available to tell us where they were or if they even made it onto the bus. The school district had failed us at this point – the police were the next logical step. “Call the police and tell them exactly what happened and ask for their help.”
I held it together until I got into my room. I called Aaron next, confirming that he was just as worried. I told him about calling the police, and he agreed it was the right thing to do. He was racing home from work to join my mom.
My mom then called to tell me the police were at our house and wanted to get a description of the kids. Did I know what they were wearing today? The tears started coming and there was no stopping them now. Our children were missing, and I couldn’t remember the clothing I set out for them on Wednesday night. Why could I not remember what I picked for them to wear?
I sobbed as I apologized for not remembering, as if having my children go missing was something I could have expected. The police were treating this as a missing child case, which frightened me even more. As I tried to catch my breath between sobs, I heard the police officer thank my mom for the details and say that he’d let her know as soon as they heard something.
My mom didn’t have any other details from the police. I hung up so her phone would be available in case they called and then I called Aaron again. He was getting close to home, cursing at the traffic in his way.
Maybe the kids fell asleep on the bus and the driver didn’t see them and took the bus back to the garage with them in it? Or what if it was a sub driver who let them off at the wrong stop and they didn’t know where they were? Maybe they didn’t even make it onto the bus and someone took them? Or what if the bus had an accident and no one had seen the wreck yet? Each scenario running through our minds was worse than the next.
Aaron decided to try calling Children’s Services to see if the girls somehow ended up there. I sat in my hotel room, three states away, staring at my phone through my tears as I waited for news, completely broken.
Then, right at 6:30pm, three hours after our two girls finished their school day, the call from Aaron: the police found their bus, and they were about five minutes from our house. I let out that deep breath I’d been holding in for almost two hours, the grip around my heart released as I was relieved to know they were almost home. The police were able to use some super-secret-police-number to contact Transportation and make someone give them an update on the bus route. Had I been at home, I probably would have offered the officer any amount of money to gain access to that number for future reference.
But they found the bus, there was some kind of issue with the bus that caused it to be so late, and it would be there any minute. Thank goodness.
“They’re here,” Aaron then said. “I’ll call you right back so you can talk to the girls.” I held the phone with both hands and locked my gaze on the screen again as I waited, only this time it was for the anticipation of hearing my daughters’ voices, voices I wasn’t 100% sure I’d hear again a little while before that. It feels overly dramatic to write that now, but there was a short period of time – a short period that felt much longer, as if time was standing still and yet running out all at once – where we weren’t sure if this was a terrible communication misstep by the district or something even worse.
My phone rang again, and I anxiously answered. “Talk to your daughters,” Aaron instructed.
“Hi mommy! I miss you!” Mira’s voice was sparkling and beautiful to my ears. “We were on the bus for a REALLY long time!”
“I know!” I laughed through the tears, “That was the longest bus ride ever!”
Cordy, as usual, didn’t waste words: “Hi mommy! I’m alive!” I have no idea if anyone told her we were worried, if she picked up on it from seeing my mom and Aaron, or if she thought she was being funny, but her cheery proclamation of living helped dissipate the remaining fears hovering over my head.
Once I knew our kids were safe, my mind switched to wanting to know what happened? Why were they on a bus for three hours? Why were we not notified?
Aaron had spoken with the driver, who wasn’t the usual driver, but was a driver we’ve seen before. The story was that there was a family issue with the usual afternoon driver, so her route was added to this driver’s route to get the kids home. (Remember that our girls route was already a double route due to the driver shortage at the start of the year, so it was really three routes in one.) Thankfully, the police remained at our house until the kids were home and they spoke with the driver to get a report.
Aaron asked the driver why she didn’t call us to let us know the situation. She said she expected that Transportation would have called all of the families to let them know. No one got a call.
Allow me to repeat: no parent or guardian received a call to let them know that there was a bus issue and that due to this issue their child might be arriving home much, much later than normal.
It’s inexcusable. I’d rather receive an extra call to make sure I was aware rather than no call at all.
Image credit: Yellow Dog Productions / Getty Images
First, parents should always be notified if there’s going to be any significant change in a bus route or arrival time. There’s a reason they make us turn in emergency contact forms, in duplicate, at the start of each year.
They have our numbers, so there’s no reason we shouldn’t be contacted for these types of issues. Safety and communication should be the guiding principals for transportation.
Parents need to know when to expect their children so that we feel secure that our children are being transported in a safe manner. Otherwise, we have no assurance that our children are coming home safely. When it was close to 6pm, and we had no communication from the district regarding our children’s bus route, we didn’t feel our children were in a safe place. Buses don’t take that long to get home. There was no advance warning of a delay, and there was no one available when we tried to call to find out where our kids were. Calling the police really was the only option available.
Also, when a situation like this comes up, parents should be notified as soon as possible and given the option to pick up their children instead of forced into an absurdly long trip home. If we had received a call that our kids were going to be on a three hour bus ride, I would have sent my mom to the school to pick them up instead. I’d never willingly let my nine and six year old girls sit on a school bus for three hours. Had they called the parents, several parents might have been able to pick up their children, leading to a shorter bus route for those who had to remain on the bus. And those who did remain on the bus wouldn’t have had parents waiting nervously at home, worried about where their kids were.
Finally, the school district let these kids down, big-time. This was an elementary school bus with mostly special needs kids on it. No child should have to sit on a hot bus for three hours without bathroom privileges, but special needs children may have additional issues that make this type of treatment especially inhumane. They may not understand why they’re being held there so long. They may get anxious that they won’t reach their home. (Cordy told me today that she was scared they’d never be taken home when she was on that bus.) They may have medical issues that could be affected by that long of a drive.
I am angry that I had to go through that kind of soul-crushing worry because of a lack of accountability on the part of the Columbus school district. No parent should have to endure that wait without any communication from the district, and no child should be forced to sit on a bus for three hours. I don’t know what protocols the school district has in place at the moment, but they failed miserably on Friday.
Aaron has already emailed the superintendent, asking for a meeting to discuss ways to prevent any parent from having to go through this again. The superintendent responded late today, agreeing that it was unacceptable and letting us know the deputy superintendent or director of transportation would be in touch soon. Hopefully they will be, or I’ll soon be in touch with them. I expect a meeting with these officials to discuss potential policy changes.
I’d like to see a parent and student bill of rights for the district’s transportation system, with procedures in place to handle unexpected bus issues. There should be a team of people to reach out to parents for any issues, offer alternatives if time permits, and keep the process running as smoothly as possible.
The Transportation office needs to have people available to answer calls each day until every last child has been dropped off at home and the buses all report that they’re empty. And alternative plans should be in place, rather than combining multiple routes, to ensure that no child is stuck on a bus for three hours, or even two hours.
The school district should take a stand to forbid any route from taking longer than one hour, with a maximum of one and a half hours for occasions when issues crop up. If you can’t get them all home within one and a half hours, you must divide it up or reach out to parents ahead of time to see if anyone would rather pick their child up at school.
I don’t think I overreacted at all. When there was no sign of my young children or word on their whereabouts three hours after they left the school, I was justified in freaking out. I’m thankful that everything was okay, but I’m also angry that it ruined my evening and scared my children. It’s an experience I never want to go through again, and I’d like to make sure no other parent or student in the Columbus City School District has to go through it, either.
Update: I did meet with the director of Transportation for Columbus City Schools. That meeting and the disappointing outcome was detailed in a later post.
Wow. That is completely inexcusable. You absolutely did the right thing by calling the police – you had no other option! I hope they are taking this problem seriously.
I hope they are, too. They did call tonight & set up a meeting for tomorrow morning. Now I just need to prepare all of our complaints as well as our proposed solutions and hope they’ll listen to us. Thanks!
Hi,
We just had the same issue with our son. He is being dropped off at 5:50 pm. Could you contact us and let us know what the result was of your meeting with the superintendent?
Lauren
You did exactly the right thing. That is absolutely horrible.
Have you heard from any other parents whose kids were also on that route? What did they do? I am wondering if the police got more than one call . . .
I did find one other parent on social media who complained about his child being on that bus, too. His child was only (“only”) on the bus for 2 hours. He’s been just as vocal about changes needing to be made after this incident. As far as I know, we were the only ones who called the police, but our kids were also the last ones off the bus.
Totally inexcusable. Have you contacted local media? I worry that they might spin it to support the upcoming schools levy but people have to know that our district is completely incompetent.
I haven’t contacted any media yet. Mostly because I’m not sure any public embarrassment would make an impact considering the list of embarrassments already on the record for the district. 🙁
As for the levy, it’s hard to have confidence in a district to properly manage additional money when something as simple as “call parents when there’s a change in bus schedule” isn’t obvious. Well, that and the whole issue of giving part of the levy money to charter schools, but that’s another issue entirely.
We are now meeting with transportation tomorrow morning. I’m hoping some immediate, concrete solutions will be developed at that meeting.
I would’ve been batsh*t crazy with worry and rage. You did the right thing; after all it was your decision to call the police that led to the girls being accounted for. And calling out the School District and pursuing changed policies is the absolutely appropriate thing to do & will hopefully make things like this a thing of the past.
Thanks, Jenny – I definitely plan to pursue changes to policy. I looked at the district’s website tonight and realized that while they post the rules for students to follow when riding the bus, there are no rights for students and parents listed when it comes to transportation. Nor are there any instructions for parents on what to do if they have questions about their child’s route or if the bus is late. I think it’s time to fix that.
Wow. How incredibly frightening! Last week, my 17yo daughter with moderate cerebral palsy was forgotten by the bus driver. Luckily, she was forgotten at home in the morning! So, we just stood at the end of our driveway for half an hour before the driver finally showed up. I mean seriously, how can a child be forgotten??? She is only one of four kids riding that bus? My husband reminded me she was left at home rather than at school or, heaven forbid, on the bus. Still. Your story brought all of those fears to life. Thanks for sharing
Oh, that hurts so much to read! I can’t imagine how your daughter felt about being forgotten, too. And I can completely understand your fears – if she can be forgotten in the morning, then it could possibly happen in the afternoon, too. I hope for you that it was a one-time only mistake that will make the driver remember not to forget her again!
I was waiting for this one and with out doubt I cried, laughed and let that deep breath out with you! I love your blog, love how REAL and descriptive it is – LOVE it! HATE that this happened and hope to God it never happens again. Your girls are so blessed to have you and Aaron in their lives, you were the chosen ones! Love it! Go get em!!! Much support and love from SC!
PS this is often how I feel as a divorced parent when the kids go with dad and don’t call or answer my texts – its the “what if’s” that get me!
Thank you, Kim! I never even thought about how similar this would be with divorced parents, not always knowing where your kids are when they’re with the other parent. The endless “what if” thoughts are maddening – I’m sorry you have to go through that so often. 🙁
Christina, I have tears in my eyes reading this, even though I already knew the end of the story and everyone would be fine. I cannot imagine how terrified you must have been.
I’m so glad they are okay!
This is just ridiculous, though- I’m fuming at that school district for you. If a bus is going to be that late, phone calls NEED to be made. A bus being 15 minutes late, I can understand. Anything more than that would have me panicking. Three hours? I’d have completely and totally lost it.
Absolutely! I have never felt that kind of pit-of-my-stomach panic before, and I hope to never feel it again. I’ve had some scary things happen in my life, but no bus and no communication from the school district regarding where my two young girls were? Terrifying.
Wow – that's horrible, Christina. I wish I had known you were going through this – I would have come sit with you in your room. And GREAT post – I hope it gets the attention it deserves and some serious changes in the way the school district communicates with parents.
Thank you, Theresa! I was originally in the lobby with the group I was going to dinner with, but as the situation worsened I realized I needed to be away from the group. A couple of ladies offered to stay behind with me, but I insisted they go on. I was trying so hard to hold it together and stay focused on what I needed to do that retreating to my room seemed like the thing to do. And then no one had to see that ugly, ugly cry!
I am so relieved the girls are safe. I am furious with you! Is there anything I can do as a Columbus resident to help? I never want you or another parent to go through a situation like this. It is inexcusable!
Inexcusable. Please do share this with the Columbus Dispatch — they are all over the incompetency and dishonesty of Columbus Public Schools, especially with a fat levy on the ballot.
I can’t imagine what you were going through, especially being far away. I’m so glad the girls are safe and I know that if anyone can affect change, it’s you! Go get ’em, Mom!
Fifteen minutes is excusable. THREE hours for ANY child, let alone special needs (gah that makes me so mad, poor kids) is NOT. You did the right thing. I read this last night and am STILL fuming. I’d so be contacting local media to call out those responsible so it doesn’t happen again. The fact that you couldn’t even get through to anyone and it took police and a “secret” number is just plain wrong.
Oh my goodness!! I would have lost my mind. Hope that you are able to fight for some real changes here; the whole scenario is just so unbelievable.
Oh Christina! I am so glad everything turned out ok and the kids were ok. What happened with the transportation office number, the school, everything was insane! You had no recourse other than to call the police, and I would have been hysterical after hour 1 myself! I hope this blows up big and safety nets and fixes are put in place quick! I’m so glad you shared the “Hi Mommy, I’m alive!”, made me laugh after tears tracking down my face. LOL 🙂
I had a similar experience last year when my daughter, Emma, was a little kindergartner. At the beginning of the year her end-of-the-day bus drop off schedule was crazily erratic. The bus was supposed to arrive at 4pm, but sometimes wouldn’t arrive until as last as 4:45pm. Not fun for mom to have to sit on the sidewalk (since the bus doesn’t drop her off at our door) – and sometimes with Emma’s 2 year old sister in tow – yet I tried to be understanding. Her route, apparently, didn’t have a permanent driver, so each day it was someone new who, each day, had to try to navigate this foreign route. Then one day the bus hadn’t arrived by 4:45 and I started to get worried. By 4:55 I was calling her school, who gave me the number for the Transportation Dept. After waiting on hold for several minutes, the lady from there told me Emma was on a route contracted out to First Student, and I’d have to call them. Again, after waiting on hold with growing agitation, I was told that no driver had shown up for the route so they had doubled up. Bottom line, my daughter didn’t arrive home that day until 5:37pm!!!! The driver was apologetic….she had bypassed Emma’s stop because another little girl was crying for having to go potty so badly. She took the other little girl home first and then circled back. Emma’s route had been added to her’s, she said, and was nowhere even close geographically. I could not place any blame on this woman, and fully supported her decision to take the other little girl home first. If Emma had been the one in need of a bathroom….Oh, can you even imagine your reaction if your child arrived home having soiled herself on the bus??? I called “6 On Your Side” the next day and explained to a very kind woman all that had happened. She made some calls then reported back to me that I should be expecting a call of apology from the Transportation Superintendent. The call never came, but the next day her route had a permanent driver and the bus was never more than 10 minutes late for the remainder of the school year.
That is horrifying! I would be beyond pissed too! I hope they actually do something to fix the issue instead of just pretending that they are fixing stuff.
I hope you post an update and that they make some substantive changes.
Oh my goodness. I felt ill just reading this. I can’t even begin to imagine what you went through that night. How horrifically terrifying.
My first thought, though, is if that had been my own special needs child, that big of a delay would have caused her to miss her evening dose of meds. That could be a huge health risk with massive implications. I can’t believe no one in the transportation company considered that.
Scary story. I’ve had my share of 45 minute to hour delays, but never anything like that. The incompetence starts long before children get on the bus, though: this year (when CCS took it back over) bus schedules for our children arrived two days after school started. CCS moved the bus stop for my high school aged daughter from East High (3/4 miles from our house) to Clearbrook MS (1-3/4 miles from our house … not that I would make/let her walk that far). The morning pick-up time for my daughter would be 6:05, for classes that start at 7:45. Instead of using CCS’s option, we found a COTA option with only 1 bus transfer that allows her to sleep 1-1/2 hours longer and wouldn’t require me to drive her to the bus stop at 5:50 AM.
For my son, CCS again determined they could not bus him to his school (St. Josephs Montessori in Italian Village, 3 blocks from Weinland Park Elementary), so they sent a form for me to send back for a payment in lieu of transportation. The form was sent on 6/14, due back no later than 6/28, with a payment (allegedly) to be made in November. We’ve never actually gotten one of those payments from CCS … I think they make them six months later so busy people forget about them. Great customer service.
This is ridiculous and needs to be addressed! I have two children in school, a 5th grader and a kindergartener, and this terrifies me. I so wish I did not have to have my children ride the bus. Fortunately it is a very short ride since we live down the street from the schools. Something needs to be done to ensure the safety of our children.